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need2moveon (original poster member #31551) posted at 8:43 PM on Monday, March 26th, 2012
Can anyone recommend a good book on maintaining appropriate boundaries? Thanks so much!
Dday: 06/97
Doing better for about 7 solid years.
Reconciled for 20 years....
authenticnow ( member #16024) posted at 11:20 AM on Saturday, March 31st, 2012
Shirley Glass, Not Just Friends.
DS, you are forever in my heart. Thank you for sharing your beautiful spirit with me. I will always try to live by the example you have set. I love you and miss you every day and am sorry you had to go so soon, it just doesn't seem fair.
Taurusinpain ( member #30284) posted at 2:57 PM on Saturday, March 31st, 2012
Are you talking about A related boundaries or boundaries in general every day life with everyone?
BW - 41
FWH - 43, SA since around 2005
Dday 4/9/10
Months and months of TT torture.
DD born 3/1/13
In R? Feels like going witht the flow.
Trying to get used to the new "normal"
Fighting2Survive ( member #28410) posted at 4:24 PM on Saturday, March 31st, 2012
Not Just Friends: Rebuilding Trust & Restoring Your Sanity After Infidelity by Shirley P. Glass, PhD
Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life by Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend
The Dance of Intimacy: A Woman's Guide to Courageous Acts of Change in Key Relationships by Harriet Lerner, PhD
Codependent No More by Melodie Beattie
Boundaries in Marriage: Understanding the Choices that Make or Break Loving Relationships by Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend
All of these address boundaries even though some of them never use the word specifically.
Me: BW, 40.......Him: FWH, 40
D-day: 3-22-10
DS1: 11, DS2: crawling
Status: R going well
"When you can tell the story and it doesn't bring up any pain, you know it is healed." - Iyanla Vanzant, Broken Pieces
hardlessons ( member #35025) posted at 1:22 AM on Tuesday, April 3rd, 2012
The first book I read after D Day was
Emotional Infidelity: How to Affair-Proof Your Marriage and 10 Other Secrets to a Great Relationship by Gary Neuman
And it was a mind blower for me, this should be required reading for all.
Me WH
Wife Tired Girl
3 adult sons
"a wayward...annnnd just a tad betrayed."
silverhopes ( member #32753) posted at 8:29 PM on Wednesday, May 8th, 2013
Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life by Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend
This book is amazing. I haven't read all of it (been trying to slowly for months) but there is a strong sense of reaching even farther back from now into FOO issues. It's such a valuable book.
So far the most helpful concept has been when people say no to the good or healthy and yes to the bad or unhealthy: reverse boundaries. What a wonderful book. 
Aut viam inveniam aut faciam.
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