Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless
We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.
I wish had words for you ... are you in IC/MC ?
so sorry ... keep posting it is slow tonight being Easter and all ... keep posting
You haven't wasted your whole life!!! You are a great person and you are learning and growing even now!! Things are going to get better for you. I think you are right to toss things back at him. It's his consequence for his actions.
Hang in there. I know I can look at my wasted marriage, over two decades, with complete horror. I usually just try to turn right back around and look forward. The future is going to be better. It has to!!
Walking the path wearing SA-spouse shoes is not easy. We are changed and stronger for it, even though we'd never ever choose for this path to be.
Peace to you.
I have found for me personally holding it in makes it worse when it does come out ...
find a way to let it out in a constructive/healthy way ... join a gym, maybe a self defense class so you can beat the shit outta something and not get in trouble for it ...
After all this revelation, I have watched myself in the mirror. I have become a hag. And I do not exaggerate. I am ugly. Saggy. Flabby where I don't actually have any fat.
And the reality is that my osteoporosis is worsening to the point that I may only have 10 more years of independent mobility. I already have significant pain. And I have NO sex drive at all. No medications that are interfering either.
That's why I say my whole life, as a wife and a lover, as a WOMAN, an active, sexual woman, is over.