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Newest Member: Hilda (61117)

User Topic: Reasons to live
♀ 6580
Member # 6580
Default  Posted: 12:51 AM, April 9th (Monday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

A friend of mine committed suicide last week, and I am feeling raw and helpless. She had been through an awful time, and she stopped fighting. And those of us left behind who were all trying to help, worrying about how to help without offending anyone's feelings. Too little, too late. Devasting.
Stay connected to your peoople, meet new people, find a reason to keep going. Godspeed, Kim.

BS - age 52- married 27 years, in IC, support groups
WH - age 57 - sex addict/porn addict, NPD
Children 2 boys, 19 & 16
D-day #1 2/2/05, D-day #2: 1/22/06
R 4/21/05, but that was another lie, just a game.
D-day #3 11/06
Divorce final may 09

Posts: 2151 | Registered: Mar 2005 | From: Florida
♀ 34808
Member # 34808
Default  Posted: 12:56 AM, April 9th (Monday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am so sorry, My brother commited suicide in March. It is heartbreaking to know that people can just feel so helpless to do this and not reach out for help. Hugs to you and her family

BW 32
WH 36

Posts: 199 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: United States
♀ 8271
Member # 8271
Default  Posted: 8:48 AM, April 9th (Monday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm so sorry. I think sometimes the thought of just ending the pain becomes all encompassing. I know I thought about it. I'm sorry your friend couldn't see a light at the end of it and sorrier that you are left wondering what you could have done. I think no matter how hard you tried, you will second guess this for awhile. But you were there and it may just be that nothing would have been enough to fix the damage inside.

"Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand." ~Homer Simpson

Posts: 6023 | Registered: Sep 2005 | From: Southeast
♀ 27196
Member # 27196
Default  Posted: 11:03 AM, April 9th (Monday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh honey, I am so very sorry you lost a dear friend to suicide.

Unfortunately there have been multiple suicides in my family, and my own DS22 has had two serious attempts. This is a very very hard thing to deal with.

There are 2 very important points I would like to make about suicide.

1. Those that committed suicide were in relentless pain and only wanted the pain to end.

2. These people are NOT selfish, weak, or thoughtless. They are people in a severe and desparate state of agony.

For those wanting to learn more about suicide please read Kay Redfield Jamison's book, Night Falls Fast. But be forewarned, it is brutal and graphic.

Again, I am so so sorry for your loss. my thoughts and prayers are with you and your friends family.


[This message edited by painpaingoaway at 11:03 AM, April 9th (Monday)]

Me, BS, 58
Him, WS 61
D-Day June 2009
Watch my movie: "My wayward husband's adventures in STD land":
Episode 1:
Episode 2:

Posts: 7192 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Coastal South
♀ 33687
Member # 33687
Default  Posted: 12:14 PM, April 9th (Monday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm so sorry about the loss of your friend. I thought about suicide after d-day, but just couldn't, couldn't leave that as a legacy to my 2 DS'. The pain that someone who commits suicide must be in is unmeasurable I am sure. Make sure you are taking care of yourself and reaching out to your loved ones in this difficult time for you!

Me-BS-44, Him-WH-45-very remorseful
OW-Married, opportunistic co-worker whore
DD#1 7-30-2011: everything else lies until 2-12-12
Married 11years, DS19y, DS15y
2.5 years out: in a good place, light at the end of the tunnel

Posts: 1646 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Illinois
♀ 30877
Member # 30877
Default  Posted: 12:56 PM, April 9th (Monday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am so sorry for the loss of your brotherr Alwaysknew and your friend discombobulated.

Hugs and strength to you both.

To PPGA....(((hugs))).

D-Day 10/28/10..almost admission 7/10 Reconciled. I was the betrayed

Posts: 1203 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: arizona
Topic Posts: 6

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