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Newest Member: Giupeppe (46032)

User Topic: Poll: Introvert or Extrovert
Weatherly
♀ 18222
Member # 18222
Default  Posted: 8:04 AM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

WH5 posted a poll down in off topic, but, I'm curious as to how the answers apply to infidelity specifically, so, I re-posted up here and have a couple more questions.

Are you an introvert or an extrovert?

I think most of us down in off topic have said introvert doesn't mean shy, it means people drain you, you get recharged by alone time. And an extrovert would be recharged by being around other people.

Is your spouse an extrovert or an introvert?

If it isn't clear in your signature, which one is the BS and the WS?

If you know the AP, are they an introvert or an extrovert?

It seems we have a disproportionate number of introverts here. The thought down there was that, this is an online forum, so it is more likely to draw people who don't want to go out and be around people, but, I wonder if the personality type has anything to do with cheating. I know opposites tend to attract. So, that means most the spouses would be E. I'm trying to see if E are more likely to cheat, by having an unscientific poll. Which would make sense, really. If my husband is pissing me off and upsetting me, and I'm exhausted, and I'm I, then why the hell would I want to go find somebody to help him make me tired and cranky? And, because an E is more likely to want to be around people, and not alone, they are more likely to have a wider social circle, and the wider the circle, the more likely you are to have possible AP's. Where as, it's awfully difficult to find somebody to cheat with when your idea of a good Friday night is the electric blanket, an empty house and a book.


Me-29,Two boys, 10 and 9

It will all be ok in the end. If it's not ok, it's not the end

Happily remarried to a wonderful man (Aussie). I think I found the right guy and the right finger this time.


Posts: 4505 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: Indiana
beautifulmess7
♀ 35259
Member # 35259
Default  Posted: 8:17 AM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am a definite introvert. I can be "extroverted" if I need to be in social situations, but I recharge with "me" time, reading, and other solitary activities. My husband is a true extrovert. He is the WS.

I actually just started reading the book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain. She talks about a lot of things in that book, but right in the introduction she says that being an introvert or extrovert has a lot of bearing on your life. It is actually scientifically proven that extroverts are more likely to cheat. It is on page 3 I think. It's an awesome book you should definitely read if you are interested in this topic.

[This message edited by beautifulmess7 at 8:18 AM, April 13th (Friday)]


Posts: 242 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Virginia
Hopetosurvive98
♀ 33842
Member # 33842
Default  Posted: 8:34 AM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am the BS and I am an introvert. I like to be in social situations but like to be alone or just with my family-that recharges me and makes me happy.
fwh is a definite extrovert. He loves to be social, loves attention, loves to be the center of attention.
OW-very much and extrovert. Exactly like fwh(I got to spend a week on an island with her-lucky me)she is loud, out there, center of attention, must have attention at all times and will do anything to get it.


Me: BS 36
Him:WS 36
DDay 9/8/11, 3yr LTA
Her: super classy coworker, 44, involved in many A's including several other coworkers.

Posts: 439 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: The beautiful south
Skye
325
Member # 325
Default  Posted: 8:53 AM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm an extrovert and my husband, the cheater, is an introvert.

Weatherly, I suspect that is why I never got over his cheating and will never forgive him. He never "needed" outside stimulation his entire life. He went way out of his box and sought an affair.

eta: I don't know his girlfriend so I can't say what she is.

[This message edited by Skye at 9:27 AM, April 13th (Friday)]


Posts: 5633 | Registered: Jul 2002
atsenaotie
♂ 27650
Member # 27650
Default  Posted: 9:17 AM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Are you an introvert or an extrovert?

introvert, strongly MB INTJ

Is your spouse an extrovert or an introvert?

extrovert, strongly

If you know the AP, are they an introvert or an extrovert?

I know one personally and he is extroverted. One is a salesman and another is a politician, so I would guess extroverted for them too.

Ö I wonder if the personality type has anything to do with cheating. I know opposites tend to attract. So, that means most the spouses would be E. I'm trying to see if E are more likely to cheat, by having an unscientific poll.

From my reading there are more extroverts than introverts (75% vs 25%), so it would make sense more extroverts involved in infidelity. I think that beyond that the extrovert personality is more likely to talk to people, so more potential contacts, more likely to talk with others about personal frustrations and resentments, so more often at the edge of the slippery slope. Typical of introverts, I tend to have a few close friends. FWW tends to have many casual friends so again is more likely to interact socially with another person who is also looking for external validation.

Where as, it's awfully difficult to find somebody to cheat with when your idea of a good Friday night is the electric blanket, an empty house and a book.

This, but there is no need to find someone to cheat with to feel better if you can feel good about yourself being alone and reading.

I never noticed the opportunities in my life for cheating until after dday. Prior to dday FWW would mention women who, as she put it, were "hot for me." I told her she was wrong, I just did not see it. Since dday I have become much more aware of the opportunities being offered.


LTA FBS 54
dday 10.5.09
Separated and Divorcing

Posts: 4161 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: FL
painpaingoaway
♀ 27196
Member # 27196
Default  Posted: 9:24 AM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

BS here, I am an introvert, but I can be extroverted when necessary For short periods of time, but 2 or 3 hrs of it, and I am exhausted, and I wanna go home.

FWH is definitely an EXTROVERT! Lord, people are so drawn to him It makes me sick!

And, well let's see OW was a prostitute, so that would make her a HO-VERT!


me BS female 56/him WS 59
Married 34 years
D-day July 09/he gave me his slut's STD
Watch my movie: "My wayward husband's adventures in STD land":
Episode 1: youtu.be/9Jv0-d_CdYc
Episode 2: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8Tz822H82Gk

Posts: 7161 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Coastal South
nomoreplease
♂ 32755
Member # 32755
Default  Posted: 9:25 AM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I (BS) am a definite introvert.

WW is a definite extrovert.

From the little I know, my guess would be that:

OM is an extrovert.

OMís BW is an introvert.

I have some friends IRL where:

The WW is a definite introvert.

And the BH is a definite extrovert.


Divorced...and moving on!

Posts: 509 | Registered: Jul 2011
Myheartstillhurt
♀ 32430
Member # 32430
Default  Posted: 9:26 AM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am an extrovert.

Bother fWH and OW/xBFF are introverts with the ability to be extrovert in some social situations.


BS(me) 34
fWH 38 (Epicallyfailedu)
OW/xBFF of 28 years
Four girls under 11
DDay: 6/5/2010

Posts: 2018 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: Michigan
de.va.sta.ted
♀ 22922
Member # 22922
Default  Posted: 9:31 AM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I would say we are both Introverts, but we are also fairly sociable.

I was just about to post that extroverts may have more opportunities to cheat because they are so drawn to people, and people are drawn to extroverts... but... it comes to the same thing with a socially skilled introvert.

It all comes down to having healthy boundaries and strong values, regardless of temperament.


Me: BW mid 40's Him: WH mid 50's
D-Day: 2009
There is a crack in everything,
That's how the light gets in...

Posts: 861 | Registered: Feb 2009
atsenaotie
♂ 27650
Member # 27650
Default  Posted: 9:36 AM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am an introvert, but I can be extroverted when necessary For short periods of time, but 2 or 3 hrs of it, and I am exhausted, and I wanna go home.

ppga, that is the very definition of introvert. It is not that we cannot or dislike inte4racting with people, but doing so takes energy from us. The extrovert is the opposite, and interacting with people energizes them.

I can be very social for 2-3 hours at a party, a family event, or doing training, but afterwards I need a few hours alone and quiet to recharge. FWW gets antsy if she has to spend more than a couple of hours alone.


LTA FBS 54
dday 10.5.09
Separated and Divorcing

Posts: 4161 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: FL
imarriedmymother
♂ 34360
Member # 34360
Default  Posted: 10:08 AM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

ME-INT

WW-EXT

OM-POS


M 24 yrs
DD 9/9/11
Drunken ONS w/aquaintance, EA/PA with co-worker. Moved in w/AP 10/1/11, Kicked Out 12/19/11
Recongealed

24 years down the tubes, but at least I lost my man boobs.


Posts: 81 | Registered: Dec 2011 | From: upper u.s.
heavyhearted1
♀ 34814
Member # 34814
Default  Posted: 10:14 AM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

We are both introverts, yet I need more alone time due to also having ADD and becoming overstimulated, so my need for alone time is greater than his-yet another thing he doesn't want to fully understand. ~sigh~


Me (BW)- 32
WH- 33
Married 13 years, have 3 children together.

D-Day 9/21/11


Posts: 64 | Registered: Feb 2012
dadof4
♂ 25534
Member # 25534
Default  Posted: 10:47 AM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm the BS and I'm extroverted. I like social situations thrive on delivering presentations and solution selling. It's what I do for a living as a Account Exec for the one of the largest Database/software/hardware companies on the planet.

WW is Introverted (never opens up or intiates any converstation which is what got her in trouble)

I wonder if the personality type has anything to do with cheating. I know opposites tend to attract. So, that means most the spouses would be E. I'm trying to see if E are more likely to cheat, by having an unscientific poll
.

I guess my dynamic is completly opposite ATS's reading.

OM- Steaming pile of human excrement. Who gives a fuck what he is.

[This message edited by dadof4 at 10:48 AM, April 13th (Friday)]


Me 52(BH)
Her 46 (FWW)
Kids-24,22,18,15
Married 25 years.
D-Day Sept 12 2009
LTA=4 years

Reconciling.


Posts: 308 | Registered: Sep 2009 | From: New Hampshire
hopefullromantic
♀ 16652
Member # 16652
Default  Posted: 10:59 AM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm really in the middle, but I live like an introvert. I very much prefer time with people, especially like minded people, and it energizes me greatly (always the last to go home), but I don't like to waste my time with people I have nothing in common with. I would then rather be alone. Which I often am.

My H (the wayward) an extrovert. He says he really doesn't like people, but people gravitate to him and he revels in it.

The AP sounded like an extrovert too.


It's not really a fairy tale 'till the witch is deposed and a few dragons are slain

Posts: 1806 | Registered: Oct 2007
Newlease
♀ 7767
Member # 7767
Default  Posted: 11:05 AM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Me - BS - Introvert
XWH - Extrovert

When we were married I used to think I wouldn't have any social interaction if it weren't for him. I found out that was wrong. I have a few very close friends who I care about very much and who care very much about me.

NL


Even if you can't control the world around you, you are still the master of your own soul.

Posts: 7807 | Registered: Aug 2005
solus sto
♀ 30989
Member # 30989
Default  Posted: 11:15 AM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm an extrovert, and X is an introvert. He practically convinced both of us the opposite was true, however.


BS-me, 52
WH (Trac-fone), 53, PD
2 kids-DD25, DS18
multiple d-days
DIVORCING
Alone, most strangely, I live on~Rupert Brooke

Posts: 9142 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: midwest
Sad in AZ
♀ 24239
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 11:16 AM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am an introvert (INTJ); I believe that the X is an extrovert because he seeks outside validation. He also forms very shallow friendships. The OW-probably an extrovert also--lots of shallow, validating friends.


Hallelujah! Holy shit! Where's the tylenol?

Posts: 20553 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
ForwardMotion
♂ 32608
Member # 32608
Default  Posted: 12:19 PM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Me - BH - Introvert (INFP)

Her - fWW - Introvert

OM - Extrovert

OM was her 'bad boy' crush from HS. I went to college with him at a small private school. We figured this triangle of fun out about a year before her A started.

Shortly after D-day I heard the infamous 'he's a lot like you.' Uh, no.

[This message edited by ForwardMotion at 12:20 PM, April 13th (Friday)]


me - BH

'It's not the end of everything,
It's just end of everything you know.'


Posts: 413 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: Tejas
Lucky
♀ 6864
Member # 6864
Default  Posted: 2:09 PM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Are you an introvert or an extrovert?

Extrovert


.

Is your spouse an extrovert or an introvert?

Introvert


.

If it isn't clear in your signature, which one is the BS and the WS?

I'm the BS


.

If you know the AP, are they an introvert or an extrovert?

extrovert = massive flirt


♥ WINE - the other fruit juice! ♥


Posts: 36162 | Registered: Apr 2005
bob1965
♂ 33296
Member # 33296
Default  Posted: 2:49 PM, April 13th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

FWW is an extrovert.

I'm an introvert.


Me: BH (47)
Her: fWWx2 (possible ONSs while drunk), lied about job, worked as a stripper (39)
Married: 14
Together: 19
Children: s 13, d 4, s 3


Who dares, wins


Posts: 143 | Registered: Sep 2011
Topic Posts: 39
Pages: 1 · 2

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