I'm currently reading it and I've had a Eureka moment based on something he said in the book. We keep having the same fights because it's pushing our core button issues. For women, its most likely disconnectedness. For men, it's either helplessness or fear of someone controlling them.
For me: I fear I'm not my husband's priority and this has been the BULK of what I bring to the table when we fight. Anyone remember how I was so hurt that he took so long to sell his affair car? yep, I wasn't the priority, nor was I during his affairs or heck, even when the kids were growing up, he focused on his career. Now why I need to be someone's priority, that's another issue. But, I can tell him this and perhaps he can see why I do what I do.
Additionally, this book explains how was have to own our part of the problem. It also reiterates how you have control of your reactions to what happens to you. Not sure about this but that's what he says.
I suspect this all is based on the drama triangle... Immensely readable...
my Ddays: 1/12, 4/12 broken NC 12/12
me (WW/BS): 48
him: (BS/WH)52
4 kiddos in mid 20's
“Most things will be okay eventually, but not everything will be. Acceptance is a small, quiet room.”
