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SBB (original poster member #35229) posted at 11:55 PM on Thursday, January 24th, 2013
Some recent posts have made me think of what we DO say in NC vs what we want to say. I find NC a struggle because I want to unleash hell but I'm getting better.
Here are a few of mine.
Noted = fuck you. I didn't need to know that.
Yes = fuck you. I can't believe you're asking such a dumb favour of me. I'm saying yes because it is for my girls. You seriously can't buy your own damn crocs for them?
Thank you = fuck you. I'm grateful you're not being a fuckwit for a nanosecond.
I ask you to reconsider = fuck you, I'm co-parenting with a fucking muppet. and not one of the important ones, a lower muppet.
Confirmed = fuck you. I hate dealing with you.
Agreed = fuck you. I suggested that a month ago.
Please <insert request to do something for the girls, usually when they're sick> = fuck you. They should be with me because you are an imcompetent baboon. Should have been involved in your family for the last 5 years and maybe you'd have a clue.
I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!
Coraline ( member #36434) posted at 11:57 PM on Thursday, January 24th, 2013
Best, funniest thing I've read all week. I'm literally laughing out loud. Thank you.
Me: BW, 34 Him: WH, 35
3 Kids: 9, 3, and 1
Decree nisi will become absolute in January. We are DONE.
myheadreallyhurt ( member #36424) posted at 2:51 AM on Friday, January 25th, 2013
Oh but sadly too true.
"See that no one repays another evil with evil, but always seek after that which is good for one another"
debbysbaby ( member #32962) posted at 2:53 AM on Friday, January 25th, 2013
-betrayed almost my whole almost 15 yr marriage
-divorced since 2004
tesla ( member #34697) posted at 2:58 AM on Friday, January 25th, 2013
It's so true, though! Every word I type to my moron is absolutely laced with 'fuck you.' (see any one of my vents.)
Sometimes I do wish that I could just go off on him but then it would be such a wasted effort. If I'm going to string together a good vent, I want people to appreciate it, dammit!!! 
"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear
Catwoman ( member #1330) posted at 3:05 AM on Friday, January 25th, 2013
That doesn't work for me=fuck you--you can't make me, so go fuck yourself.
Please send the documentation for that=fuck you--I don't trust a word you say and even if you told me the sky was blue and the grass was green, I would check.
No=no. If you have a problem with understanding that, ask your Mommy because obviously this lesson didn't take.
Cat
FBS: Married 20 years, 2 daughters 27 and 24. Divorced by the grace of GOD.
D-Days: 2/23/93; 10/11/97; 3/5/03
Ex & OW Broke up 12-10
"An erection does not count as personal growth."
wontdefineme ( member #31421) posted at 3:15 AM on Friday, January 25th, 2013
Too bad NC wasn't as funny or easy when they first blow our lives up. Too bad for them that they only really blew up their own lives and liberated us!
Silence = fuck you
Divorce = fuck you
NC after divorce = ultimate fuck you
caregiver9000 ( member #28622) posted at 4:09 AM on Friday, January 25th, 2013
Me: fortysomething, independent, happy,
XH "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
two kids, teens. Old enough I am truly NO CONTACT w/ NPD zebraduck
S 5/2010
D 12/2012
solus sto ( member #30989) posted at 4:33 AM on Friday, January 25th, 2013
This made me laugh out loud.
BS-me, 62; X-irrelevant; we’re D & NC. "So much for the past and present. The future is called 'perhaps,' which is the only possible thing to call the future. And the important thing is not to let that scare you." Tennessee Williams
ruinedandbroken ( member #29250) posted at 4:42 AM on Friday, January 25th, 2013
“People who cheat feel that life is for the taking, and that everyone deserves happiness no matter what the cost. I must remember these tricks if I ever have my soul surgically removed."
Me: BS 42. Him: WH 41 2 Kids 8&11
Married 14 yrs Together 21
wannabenormal ( member #19772) posted at 4:51 AM on Friday, January 25th, 2013
Good day! = I'm done with this exchange because you're so fucking irritating and hard headed, it's not worth pursuing the argument. I know I will say something I'll regret - so I'll 'good day' it. I say it in my head very curtly, like GOOD DAY!
I'm sure he 'gets' that. Ha ha! He probably reads it as - she still wants me.
[This message edited by wannabenormal at 10:53 PM, January 24th (Thursday)]
gonnabe2016 ( member #34823) posted at 5:30 AM on Friday, January 25th, 2013
K = I got your message. I'm not ignoring you (just to combat any accusations of *not* communicating), but you are not worth the effort of adding an *o*.
"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott
In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.
wannabenormal ( member #19772) posted at 5:37 AM on Friday, January 25th, 2013
K's my new one too - you've been acknowledged, be dismissed!
dmari ( member #37215) posted at 6:26 AM on Friday, January 25th, 2013
I love you guys!! I have a huge smile on my face and I am cracking up!! Thank you!! We need comedy relief once in while with all the shit we deal with!
jjct ( member #17484) posted at 10:42 AM on Friday, January 25th, 2013
Strong - you're now immortalized on the quote thread.
My ribs hurt.
GreatRoleModel ( member #36809) posted at 10:54 AM on Friday, January 25th, 2013
These are great! What a great way to start my day reading this post. It was like you all were reading my mind when I read the crap he sends me. Thank you all!
[This message edited by GreatRoleModel at 4:55 AM, January 25th (Friday)]
BS (me)
XNPDWS
It takes a village to deal with the village idiot!
“If we couldn't laugh we would all go insane.”
― Robert Frost
nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 11:51 AM on Friday, January 25th, 2013
"lower muppet"
Day made. Thanks, SBB! 
You can call me NIK
And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane
CharlieFoxtrot ( member #38010) posted at 12:36 PM on Friday, January 25th, 2013
Hahahahaha!! I love it, and I literally spit coffee on this one!!
Strong, you made my day!!
Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.
PurpleRose ( member #33129) posted at 1:04 PM on Friday, January 25th, 2013
Ohhh this is awesome. I love it!
And I'm adding "K" to my repertoire because he constantly sends dumbass texts that don't require responding, but then I'm accused of not being a co-parent !!!!
divorced the Dooosh 8/13
*****************************
Dance like nobody is watching,
Text and email like it will be used in court someday...
LS_Betrayed ( member #33697) posted at 1:55 PM on Friday, January 25th, 2013
Best, funniest thing I've read all week. I'm literally laughing out loud. Thank you.
OMG me too! It is like you sucked the thoughts right out of my brain!!!
Me (BS) - 49
WS - 51
Daughters 18, 13 and 12
Married 24 years, currently divorcing-- not soon enough
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