SurvivingInfidelity.com Forum Archives

TarheelMom posted 2/21/2013 18:12 PM

We'll be married 10 years in April. I really don't want to count one of those years... but it has brought us to where we are, and we were married the whole time... so I guess I am. I don't want to not count it at the same time. You understand, I'm sure. Anyway. 10 years in April.

We're surviving. Most days are good. We have a lot of happy times and he's done SOOO much to make things better. The few rough days are really rough, but getting back on track is easier and is team work. We're making it. I'm glad.

So fWH has said that whatever I want out of our anniversary is what we will do. He wants to live up to my expectations and make it all I'm dreaming of... or ignore it if that is what I want. Our budget is pretty small right now, too... since he did quit his job for me and all.

I like his attitude. He understands. Last year's anniversary was right before DDay and once I found out, all of the sweet things he said at our anniversary dinner had such a different meaning. I hated every minute of it in hindsight.

So, I think we are going to renew our vows this year. We've talked about it since DDay, and we had talked about doing it every 10 years since we got married anyway. Something really small, just us, nice and simple.

I would like to get something engraved in our rings. I don't hate my rings, and I have never broken my vows to him, so the meaning of his ring hasn't changed. I know some people have problems with their rings after an A, but I haven't found that I have so much.

What I'm looking for are some ideas for one word to have engraved inside each of our wedding bands. With some meaning of what we have been through. Any ideas?

Knowing posted 2/21/2013 18:32 PM

I'm considering having the words "love, joy, peace, courage" tattooed on my wedding finger so that I can stop wearing a wedding band. It's been years since my wedding band fit properly.

Those words are part of a commitment I have made to all aspects of my life, not just my M, so I'm comfortable with having those words tattoed whether fWH and I stay together or not.

[This message edited by Knowing at 6:33 PM, February 21st (Thursday)]

TarheelMom posted 2/22/2013 06:27 AM

We've talked about doing tattoos also. I'm just not quite ready yet.

Lucky posted 6/5/2013 01:49 AM

For the rings; Eternity?

itainteasy posted 6/5/2013 08:21 AM

"Triumph"?

forgivingnow posted 6/5/2013 08:40 AM

"strength" "courage"

Congratulations on 10 years!! Did you do a vow renewal?

We celebrate 30 years of marriage this month. I understand what you mean when you say you don't want to 'count' one of the years...
At 1 year from dday, I felt the same way...didn't want to count 5 years...at 27 months from dday and celebrating 30 years of marriage with the man who is now the husband of my dreams, I'm counting all the years. We have a REAL marriage. After dday when things were really bad we decided to hold on tighter and make something we both wanted.

I hope you are proud and happy of how strong you are and can celebrate your 10 years this whole year.

madeincanada posted 6/5/2013 09:10 AM

Awesome and congrats to both of you. We are planning the same thing, we are going to have celtic bands custom made !!! Sort of a new begining. Something cool we did that we absoluetly love is .... got tatoos !!!...a celtic love knot.... Our kids were like "whattttttttt the". We are recovering well , facing some challenges, we will make it and when we are ready we too will renew.Thank You for the positive post.

doesitgetbetter posted 6/5/2013 11:32 AM

Resilience.

TarheelMom posted 6/5/2013 20:28 PM

We did renew our vows, it was a beautiful ceremony that we wrote. Just us, two couples we know that we are close to (to take pictures!) and our son. It was a perfect day from start to finish.

A year ago, I never thought we'd get here.

We never got anything engraved in our rings... we couldn't decide and ran out of time to do it before our anniversary. Next year!

Knowing posted 6/5/2013 21:53 PM

Congratulations!

karmahappens posted 6/5/2013 22:20 PM

I like the idea of engraving the rings.

the journey

Because it's a forever kind-of trip ;)

[This message edited by karmahappens at 10:21 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)]

still-living posted 6/6/2013 03:49 AM

I quit wearing my ring. My wife surprised me by melting it down and combined it with other gold she wasn't using, including her high school ring, and gave me a new larger ring. Inside it, she engraved, "Trust and Love Forever" She did this on her own.