-Finding my way-
I'm like are you kidding me?? He wakes up every night and is on his phone or iPad every single night. And for months was communication with the OW.
I used to stalk his OW on FB as well, it helped me figure out what was going on because she got bolder as time progressed. She's blocked us, and he's blocked her and I can't see anything anymore. It's probably a good thing, FB would have probably banned me for eventually flaming her...
The grass is greener on the other side. But they put chemicals on theirs.
Ahhhhh sleep! I remember sleep!
I don't know your story, but I wouldn't be running around in the middle of the night for him. What's he got, the flu? Too bad, he'll live. Let him deal with it..believe me, its you who needs the first aid.
I just don't care anymore. I don't care that he is trying to be nice. I don't care if he wants or needs me. I just don't care.
I remember that feeling, you do because it's expected of you in the role of the S, but then kick yourself for it.
I wish I could help you sleep... have you tried melatonin? Maybe 3 to 5 mg at bedtime might help. (((HUGS)))
When his family jokingly tells you of how "spoiled" HE was as a child, RUN- It doesn't change when they get older!
Married 17 yrs
Working on it.....
I know how you feel. I hate hearing him snore while I'm awake and shaking.
I hope you get some rest soon.
He actually got up to check on me and insisted that I talk to him because obviously something was bothering me. We talked for 2 hrs before going to bed because he wanted to hear everything on my mind even though he felt awful.
Hey this is good news. It shows he is at least taking an interest in your pain. That's a start!
As for hating him, yourself, the OW, the world, well frankly that's ok too. You're still so new, it's all still so raw. There's no timescale to any of this except that which you force upon yourself. give yourself time to feel like crap. You'll start to heal when you are ready.
I am sleeping sort of OK but wake up with a rabid heart rate and sick stomach every morning. I literally woke up one morning and felt fine, then seconds later stomach was all in knots.
May be a different perspective than what you're thinking, but worth exploring, maybe? After all, kids can really help with the most f*cked up of situations..!
Hopefully your pain and anguish will end sooner rather than later..
This above all: to thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man ~ Shakespeare, Hamlet