Little story on the background.
My WH and I have been married for 12 1/2 years and have an 11 yr old DD and 5 year old B/G twins. We met while stationed in Germany and got married 4 months later.
In December my WH came to me and said that he was no longer in love with me and that he was not sure how he felt. I was numb and not sure how to feel. He told me he has felt like this for 3 years but wanted to see if his feelings would change or if could confrom to the changes.
Once he told me this I started snooping and found that he had been texting and call OW excessively for 3 months. One month he talked to her for 971 minutes and almost a 1000 text messages. I also found a receipt in his wallet for a prepaid cell phone and minutes. I waited a little to confornt him. At first he denied the phone and amount of calls when I showed it to his face but then he figured out that duh...evidence is right here.
Fast forward to January and he told me that he was will to work on the marriage to see if it would work. I asked him one thing and that was to stop texting her. Well duh. I should have known WH could not stop texting OW. His excuse has been and always will be she is just a friend. They both work together and are cops. Her husband is also a cop. My WH tells me that OW texts and messages a lot of her co-workers. Okay...they are not my husband.
Anyways..we decided to go ahead and divorce because I couldn't trust him and he didn't want to give her up.
This past Friday I told him I was done trying to get him to change his mind, that I don't love him and I would never ask him to work on the marriage. Well WH texted Monday at work as I was walking to the lawyers office for a consultation that "the past 3 days haven't been that bad. Just a thought". I started laughing. When I got back to work he said "since the past few days haven't been that bad maybe our marriage can be saved". I talked with him last night even though he didn't want to talk to me. I told him that I would work on the marriage with him only if he could do a few things because if he didn't I would not and would not care if our marriage would work out. I asked WH if he would stop texting OW all together and give me access to his cell phone records. Well it took WH 10 mintues sure was his answer. I don't know what to do if anything.
I don't want my marriage to end because I do love him but I feel there may be more than he is telling me that they are just friends. He does not believe that what he did was an emotional affair.