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Newest Member: DJC1978 (60705)

User Topic: What do to on our anniversary?
♂ 36479
Member # 36479
Default  Posted: 7:58 PM, April 7th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

We don't know what to do for our anniversary as bs does know how she will react. Last year right after dinner day we went away for a night. We don't know if we should do presents, go away, do nothing or just drop the kids off at my parents, have dinner a movie, sleep in the next day. Not sure what is right after dinner day.

Me (WH - 37)
Her (BS - 35)zayda1
Married 7 years, together for 9
2 children (5 years & 2 years)
Discovery of PA 04/15/12

Posts: 60 | Registered: Aug 2012
♂ 26859
Member # 26859
Default  Posted: 8:47 PM, April 7th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I would suggest keeping it simple and sincere. Avoid anything that might be a potential trigger.

WH - 46 (crap...)
BW - gerrygirl

Posts: 6114 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Tri-Cities
♀ 30119
Member # 30119
Default  Posted: 9:51 AM, April 8th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I second the sincere part. Do something y'all both find peace in.

Is there a way to plan something new that has no history or triggers for either of you? I'm thinking like a day trip to the beach or zip lining or a day of museum outings? What about y'all get some paper and attempt to draw each other or maybe plan a scavenger hunt with silly clues that eventually lead to a cute little present?

BGF (me)- 27
FWBF (him)- 27

forgiven and in R :)

"To err is human.
To forgive,

<3 DS always

Posts: 993 | Registered: Nov 2010 | From: Houston, TX
♀ 35971
Member # 35971
Default  Posted: 2:48 PM, April 8th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I second poopylala's suggestions.

Me - BS
WH - old
4 Kids
Dday May 2012

Posts: 1569 | Registered: Jun 2012
♂ 37194
Member # 37194
Default  Posted: 4:48 PM, April 8th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Keep it as light as possible and go with the flow of your BS. Don't watch any movies that could bring up any triggers, stick to something you have already watched and both enjoyed free of A related plots or subplots. Try to do something she feels comfortable with and let her guide you through the day.

Me: BH 37
FWW: 37 (sosorryididthis)
DDay: June 29, 2012
Married 18 years, together 19
2 great kids
I have to stop dwelling on the past so I can stay excited about the future!

Posts: 52 | Registered: Oct 2012 | From: Southern Oregon
♂ 23667
Member # 23667
Default  Posted: 11:31 AM, April 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I purposed to make plans that would create great memories with my wife right from the beginning.

I order flowers, usually roses and have them arranged nicely from the florist.

I make reservations at a nice restaurant and make plans to stay for desert.

The desert time is my favorite. I order one item and we share.... Here's the catch, you can only have a bite when the other one gives you a bite. It makes for smiles and laughs.

I also like to find a nice place to go for a walk, where we can relax and hold hands, usually a park or a mall if the weather is bad.

I went online and ordered some beautiful rocks that are engraved with sayings on them, that speak just to her.
you can find them here -

My goal is always to help my wife re-claim what is HERS. Our marriage and our celebration of that belongs to HER alone and cannot be owned by anyone else.
I have purposed to let her know how special she is by doing special things that creat NEW and WONDERFUL memories.

Wishing you well....

[This message edited by Card at 11:32 AM, April 9th (Tuesday)]

WH (me)
BS (her)

D-Days April - Oct. 2007 Recovery started Nov. 2007

"Found Myself", I was right there in my shoes all along!
Search for self called off!

Why Repentance Is Necessary? Because Undeserved Mercy Empowers Entitlement/Sin

Posts: 570 | Registered: Apr 2009
♀ 36853
Member # 36853
Default  Posted: 10:22 PM, April 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I wrote my BH a letter and gave it to him a few days before our anniversary. I also tried to stick to making new memories, low key, and away from crowds or potential triggers. I didn't want my BH to feel pressured to act happy if he didn't feel like it. The focus was on him and what he might feel comfortable with.

fWW 40s, BH 40s
D-day 27 Aug 2012. Kids 25, 17, 13. 2 dogs.

I edit often to fix stuff ☺️

Profoundly grateful Every. Single. Day. that I am blessed with an H with strength, integrity, and compassion, and that he decided to try.

Posts: 1814 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Deep South, USA
Topic Posts: 7

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