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Newest Member: SnowyOwl

New Beginnings :
Feels worse than D Day

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 twiceburned (original poster member #21590) posted at 5:23 AM on Monday, April 8th, 2013

Selling the house I raised our kids in. Tonight is hard.....I feel as though I have no one to turn to in my immediate world, so I turn to strangers yet friends......who get it. Just need a little "atta girl" to get me thru.

How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time......

posts: 151   ·   registered: Nov. 11th, 2008   ·   location: Southeastern US
id 6289862
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disillusioned12 ( member #37542) posted at 7:35 AM on Monday, April 8th, 2013

(((twiceburned)))

BS (Me)
WS (H)
Married 5 yrs; Together 10 yrs

D-Day 11/14/12
EA(PA?)
Limbo 1 month
False R 2 months.
Status: Divorce on hold

posts: 228   ·   registered: Nov. 18th, 2012
id 6289927
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exhausted lady ( member #30217) posted at 8:03 AM on Monday, April 8th, 2013

(((twiceburned)))

You can do this. It really, really IS going to get better.

Sometimes the hardest part of finally seeing through someone is accepting what you see...

God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to
change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me.
-Reinhold Neibuhr

posts: 3171   ·   registered: Nov. 25th, 2010   ·   location: Colorado
id 6289937
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CheaterMagnet ( member #33581) posted at 8:24 AM on Monday, April 8th, 2013

Attagirl!!

I promise. It does get better. You CAN do this!

If Happy Ever After did exist, I would still be holding you like this.
All those fairly tales are full of shit.
One more fucking love song I'll be sick. ~ Maroon 5

posts: 1968   ·   registered: Oct. 11th, 2011
id 6289943
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Survivor3512 ( member #37946) posted at 12:48 PM on Monday, April 8th, 2013

Attagirl! You can do this. And it does get better. You will feel a sense of relief once you are settled in your new home. This is a good thing. Remember, it gets you one step further away from the past and one step closer to peace, joy, and happiness. Hang in there!!!

Me (BS)- 36
Divorced
----------------------------------------------------------
Just keep swimming, just keep swimming- Dorie

posts: 293   ·   registered: Dec. 30th, 2012   ·   location: Southeastern U.S.
id 6290003
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million pieces ( member #27539) posted at 12:50 PM on Monday, April 8th, 2013

((hugs))

Me - 52 D-Day 2/5/10, separated 3 wks later, Divorced 11/15/11!!!!

posts: 2040   ·   registered: Feb. 10th, 2010   ·   location: MD
id 6290005
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Sunnie ( member #33406) posted at 1:18 PM on Monday, April 8th, 2013

hugs twiceburned. Stay strong! Change is hard but it will be worth it!

Me: BS (32)
Together: 14 years
DDay: May 18, 2011
Separation date: November 18, 2012

posts: 73   ·   registered: Sep. 20th, 2011
id 6290026
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EvenKeel ( member #24210) posted at 1:34 PM on Monday, April 8th, 2013

Selling the house I raised our kids in.

You are selling the house, but not the memories you made there. You will have them forever & ever.

It helps me sometimes to think of these changes as an ending to a chapter in your life....but you have many more cool chapters to go!

posts: 6985   ·   registered: May. 31st, 2009   ·   location: Pennsylvania
id 6290037
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LadyQ ( member #32847) posted at 2:34 PM on Monday, April 8th, 2013

What EvenKeel said. The memories are yours to keep. The house is sticks and stones...

Tune out the noise of what others tell you about who you are and work it out for yourself...

posts: 1650   ·   registered: Jul. 21st, 2011
id 6290097
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dlmos ( member #36839) posted at 4:37 PM on Monday, April 8th, 2013

((((Twiceburned))))

BH (32)
DS - 7, DD - 6
Divorced

posts: 461   ·   registered: Sep. 16th, 2012   ·   location: Fort Worth,Texas
id 6290230
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Newlease ( member #7767) posted at 10:46 PM on Monday, April 8th, 2013

I felt the same way when my home sold. It was rough, but it did get better. It is so much easier to move on without all the ghosts.

You got this!

NL

Even if you can't control the world around you, you are still the master of your own soul.

posts: 8471   ·   registered: Aug. 1st, 2005
id 6290755
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 twiceburned (original poster member #21590) posted at 10:49 PM on Monday, April 8th, 2013

Thank you one and all. I forgot how much support and love I gleamed from this site right after D day, so glad I came back around. Today is a better day, packed more boxes, and also doing some change of address stuff, it felt good to have a date to forward the mail, and I know that once I get past the move, life will become simpler. I have to find a way to let go of the bitterness. I thought I had, but it rears its ugly head during stressful times.

How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time......

posts: 151   ·   registered: Nov. 11th, 2008   ·   location: Southeastern US
id 6290761
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hurtinky ( member #26152) posted at 9:29 AM on Tuesday, April 9th, 2013

Been there, done that. The saddest moment of my life was sitting on the porch the night before I closed. My kids were grown and gone. It felt like everyone just got up and left, like I was the last person standing.

But, it turned out to be the best thing I ever did.

The kids were proud of me. They love my new home.

It's gonna be ok.

Me --> BS
D-Day 10-1988
D-Day 9-12-2005
S 9-13-2005
D 3-6-12


posts: 1500   ·   registered: Nov. 11th, 2009   ·   location: Kentucky
id 6291259
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nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 11:01 AM on Tuesday, April 9th, 2013

It is hard, twiceburned. There are so many memories and emotions that swirl during this process of selling the house. It hit me hard last summer.

Make sure you honor those feelings as they arise. Allow yourself to mourn the closing of that chapter so you can walk forward from that past into your future.

(((((twiceburned)))))

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6291289
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