Well, his mother fell a couple of weeks ago and she has never woken up. She started crashing a couple of days ago. They are withdrawing support tomorrow. SO's ex was out of town when it happened, was silent for a while, and then she has started texting me letting me know when she is visiting. Once again, no one really wants her there, SO's mom certainly wouldn't have wanted her there and she isn't bringing their son. Just weird out of the blue, texting me to make sure I knew she was visiting too. SO and I actually predicted this last week and I said as long as he acts the same way as before, all is good. It is just amazing how so self absorbed some people are that they don't realize the impact they have on others. I haven't told him about the texts, he has too much going on right now.
Anyway, the past couple of weeks have sucked. I knew the severity, I work in an ICU, I knew the signs. Caught between wanting the family to understand and then not wanting to be the one to tell them. Now tomorrow. In some ways this is sooo much worse than their father dieing in home hospice from cancer. She was eating dinner with us one minute and then being rushed to the hospital in less than an hour. She was such a vital woman, I was looking forward to her being in my life and learning from her. My dd cried when i told her last night. This just sucks. I am pretty good about holding it together at work, but when I see families say their goodbyes, I loose it. I just can't imagine tomorrow, I am going to be a mess
And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane
You're doing great so far...
D-Day, June 10, 2012
I am sending you strength and courage during this time.
My father died when I was 11, leaving my mother with 5 children under the age of 16.
People get thru these times, they surely do. This is what live life is all about.
Sending many hugs and the words to comfort your SO.
I am just so fried right now. I've made some stupid mistakes at work, I just can't focus. I sitting here supposed to be putting together a presentation. I've spent the last two nights w/o kids just hanging w remaining dog (her time is near too) just in a little cocoon. No radio or music. Just quiet. Just gearing myself up for typical crazy thursdays were my kids have 3 after school obligations and I don't start dinner until 7:30pm. Weekend w kids is crazy too, bday parties, a play, soccer game, LAX, etc. And then viewing on Sunday and funeral on Monday.
I am strong, I will get through, but if I loose my other dog soon I will just loose it. I've had my dogs before marriage, when kids were little and I was a lonely, isolated SAHM. And then after separation. They kept me moving those first months when I could have just stayed in bed when the kids were with their father. They used to be my running buddies then turned into hiking buddies. We walked to Ritas just last week and I knew it was the last time.
This was years ago, but these are the dogs I remember. The smaller one on the right was Wren, she passed on Sunday. Gypsy is on the left. Oh, and those are my human kids
Beautiful picture, beautiful babies (human and fur).
"Truth has no special time of its own. Its hour is now - always." - Albert Schweitzer
Me: BW - Him: 200+ # tumor removed 7/09
One AMAZING DS - 34