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I feel so stupid

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turned123 posted 4/15/2013 12:55 PM

Ive had some time to reflect and look back on my year long new beginning. I saw things the way I wanted to see them not how they really were. I feel stupid, used and cast aside. My role in my disapiontment was considerable. The truth is she was just coasting. I'm just pissed today. Pissed at myself, pissed at her, pissed at being single again. The upside is that the sadness has lifted and I have a better grip on how my perception is just that, and reality checks are needed more often than I thought.

lieshurt posted 4/15/2013 12:57 PM

Don't feel stupid. This was another life lesson for you to learn from is all. We all go through it.

(((turned123)))

notmeanymore posted 4/15/2013 13:07 PM

I don't know if it will come as any consolation, but you're not the first person to fall into that trap.

You'll be wiser next time.

jo2love posted 4/15/2013 13:10 PM

(((turned)))

turned123 posted 4/15/2013 13:12 PM

Not the first person
Sooo true! Thanks gang!

nowiknow23 posted 4/15/2013 13:15 PM

The upside is that the sadness has lifted and I have a better grip on how my perception is just that, and reality checks are needed more often than I thought.
This is great, turned. Growth and progress. Well done, you.

turned123 posted 4/15/2013 13:29 PM

Thank you nik!... something about old dogs and new tricks

k94ever posted 4/15/2013 16:03 PM

You aren't stupid.

Face it....most of us haven't dated in DECADES and things have changed enormously.

You aren't stupid. The relationship didn't work and you are better prepared for the next one.

Plus you dodged the bullet with her.

But look on the up side....you at least were dating!!!!!!!!!

Stop over-thinking this. You. Are. Not. Stupid.

k9

turned123 posted 4/15/2013 16:16 PM

K9 thank you! I know it's just a brief feeling. There are some things I don't regret. I don't regret being able to open my heart again!!! I don't regret learning to laugh again! I don't regret giving myself! I do regret not acting on the red flags when I saw them! It truly is a live and learn!!! so I also don't regret dodging another bullet

SBB posted 4/15/2013 16:51 PM

I saw things the way I wanted to see them not how they really were.

I did this throughout my M and I don't feel confident that I wouldn't do it again - my picker is on the fritz and I need to take time to develop healthy coping mechanisms. Head in sand doesn't work for me but it seems to be my reflex reaction.

You're going to be OK friend. Learning what you don't want is as important as knowing what you do want.

[This message edited by StrongButBroken at 5:02 PM, April 15th (Monday)]

turned123 posted 4/16/2013 06:42 AM

Strongbutbroken I do know what I want You are correct learning what stands in the way of that is key! Sometimes it's dressed like a cute and fuzzy bunny but it has REALLY big sharp teeth

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