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Mental NC

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tsol25 posted 4/15/2013 15:52 PM

It's been a while since I posted on si. Things got too confusing to keep up with let alone keep posting. Exwbf and I have been broken up for a year now and it's been that long since we've had any contact. (Ok except I sent him a happy birthday in early summer last year when things weren't really set either way)

The thing I have trouble with is mental nc. I have never since that one time been tempted to text, call, or do anything other than avoid him. But as soon as a song, you know almost any song comes on the radio, I start thinking about him or us. It doesn't have to be a sentimental song to us, in fact I've changed a lot of my music taste in the past year so it shouldn't remind me of us. It doesn't have to be words that really seem to connect to me other than the song has to do with a guy and a girl. It's not only music, although that might be the worst of it.

Does anyone have any tips with putting an end to this?

Luvlyla posted 4/15/2013 16:39 PM

well i have found when he pops into my head, i feel the same way as i would if i bumped into him in a bar, and i automatically think "oh god, not you, just bugger off, i cant be arsed with this now".

It still happens 100 times a day, but im hoping it will ease up as my mind is automatically fed up every time he raises his ugly cheating lying head.

the songs definitely don't affect me any more, or films or even hearing his name. songs on the radio, movies etc, are all my life, and he doesnt get to belong in it anymore. i also sing the songs loudly to help, they're mine, not his. he can bugger off when he rears when his head in the middle of a good song.

ManBearDivorce posted 4/15/2013 23:58 PM

Oh, I hear her favorite song everytime on the radio. I just say to myself, They are really meant for each other and god gave them each other. I'm hungry now, I think I want my cheese cake! More and more every time I hear her song I think about cheese cake. LOL You really have to put new feelings on the songs and create new memories forget all the old ones. It's still there but it will be under all the cheese cakes and that makes me feel better. lol

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