SurvivingInfidelity.com Forum Archives

Stangfreak posted 4/17/2013 21:28 PM

So as you can see if you care to look, this is not my first rodeo (although it is the first time he has thrown his hotdog down an undoubtedly wide, stretchy hallway) and I want to beat the damnit out of something.

My WH has two elderly parents who have been quite ill. He drove six hours to visit them and handle some necessities. According to him, he got bored, called OW up, and screwed her on his parents couch. Pissed is one word that I could use, but it would be a gross understatement.

Come to find out, he has been texting her, telling her that he loved her, that he was going to divorce me in January, and they were going to spend their lives together. I didn't find this out from him. I found it out for OW.

She feels sooo guilty. She has been texting me to check on me and make sure that I am alright. What a bitch. WH went NC, but she still wants to be friends, despite being told in no uncertain terms to have no contact.

Does anyone else believe that she is contacting me to see if we are done so she can pounce? Personally, I believe she is a backstabbing bitch who knowingly slept with a married man and is waiting for her opportunity. WH is even more responsible, but I am so used to it that I can't help to think that they deserve each other. He is on here as Joker317 if you want to read his story on the Wayward side.

Opinions? I sure could use a few.

NoraLee posted 4/17/2013 21:50 PM

There is no end to the lengths some OWs will go...she's fishing for info - my OW wanted to meet meet me and my kids - have us over for a BBQ - that way I'd be less suspicious...H knew she's not someone I would ever socialize with so it never materialized...I don't hang with junkies - colour me judgemental!! But the thought behind it was so manipulative and your OW is no different...do not respond to her - nothing...if she gave a damn about you, she would have kept her legs closed...

[This message edited by NoraLee at 9:51 PM, April 17th (Wednesday)]

Stangfreak posted 4/17/2013 21:54 PM

Kind of what I figured. What a bitch.

gonnabe2016 posted 4/17/2013 22:19 PM

SF, I read your profile.

You've got bigger fish to fry with your WH than this OW.

Block her on your phone, on your email, on your FB, on his phone, email, and FB.

Deal with your WH's problems. He's got some big ones.

Stangfreak posted 4/17/2013 22:36 PM

Believe me, I know. We have tried individual therapy, couples therapy, medications. You name it and we have done it. He ses to be more addicted to attention than sex.

callmecrazy posted 4/18/2013 07:48 AM

Oh she is your friend now...how sweet My OW (ok they made up the texts bc I thought they were after sleep overs, so NO AFFAIR haha!) let me know nothing happened. She was out in a tractor w my WH late at night and my father in law saw and was suspicious. They worked on 4H stuff together...when he spent the night he parked out front for all to see. Its so open theres nothing to it right?? Obviously they have big ol' balls and think if they throw it in everyones face it will be less suspicious. Unfortunately, they are finding our small community has been mumbling "if it looks like a duck..."
These people are warped. Dont try to understand it, you will become crazy (like me). PROTECT YOURSELF. Do not talk to her, she is not your friend. You got all the helpful info you will out of her regarding the situation, so she no longer has a purpose in your life other than a trigger for you and maybe even WH.

Im so sorry you have to go through all of this. It is not fair.

Stangfreak posted 4/18/2013 07:58 AM

Your first sentence made my day.

I just don't get how some people can sleep with themselves at night. She is doing more blame shifting to ease her twisted soul than WH has. But she literally does not matter.

I just don't know if I will ever look at WH the same way again. I want to. I want things to be okay, but when he tries to show affection, I get these stupid movies in my head of hm screwing. Does that ever go away?

Edith posted 4/18/2013 09:09 AM

Hey there Stangfreak!
Those crafty OW, they are a wily bunch. Gutter skank wanted to have its wedding reception at my house Merely months later it divorced its new H, quit its job and demanded that my H start paying its bills.

If I were you I would change my number and look at getting an order of protection if you continue to be bothered. OW is merely a distraction from the larger issue of your H. I'm so sorry you are going through this yet again.

By the way, "She Who Must Not Be Named..." what's up with that?? Has he not told you who she is?!? Good grief.

Take care,
E.

Stangfreak posted 4/18/2013 10:53 AM

She Who Must Not Be Named came about because I can't say her name without wanting to commit a felony.

Lyonesse posted 4/18/2013 11:00 AM

Her name's Whorangutan. That's the one I settled on after viewing all the excellent options on a thread here. Such lovely alliteration with her last name, too.

edited: misplaced comma, as if I didn't have enough problems!

And yes, my opinion is also that she is fishing and trying to worm her way into your lives anywhichway she can.

[This message edited by Lyonesse at 11:02 AM, April 18th (Thursday)]

Stangfreak posted 4/18/2013 11:03 AM

Perhaps I should be a bit more creative in my name-a-ho process. Suggestions?

Getting to Happy posted 4/18/2013 11:06 AM

Hey ladies, I have a great video that Painpaingoaway PM'ed me that really helps with the mind movies.

(Thanks PPGA )

It's kinda gross but hilarious and really works with those horrible sex flicks that come up when your WH makes his moves on you.

I don't like to post it outright but if you like, PM me and I will shoot it to you.

I hate mind movies. Mr. Happy and I are trying to R. The thought of Whorestein and him...UGH! It used to creep me out when we made love! But this youtube video really does the trick.

The best think was when I showed him the video and told him what I thought about it. Now he cannot think of his nasty tryst with the ho-worker without throwing up a bit in his mouth....

Lyonesse posted 4/18/2013 11:22 AM

Just keep reading SI...the creativity of the people on here never ceases to amaze and amuse me. When you find the perfect name for her, you'll know it! I think the one that made me laugh the most was something like Slutty McTrampypants.

callmecrazy posted 4/18/2013 11:41 AM

Stangfreak
Idk if it goes away. Definitely block that woman from your life. It takes two to tango (or do some nasty ho dance more like it). No blameshifting. YOUR marriage had issues, that didnt need her involvement and especially not her vaginas involvement. THEY did it, not you, not just him, not just her. You have loved/love him...not her. Thats the difference, there is no need for you to care about her. She obviously cares what you think about her, thats her problem. She can live with her own actions.

RyeBread posted 4/18/2013 15:01 PM

name-a-ho

Sounds like a really fun board game from Mattel. I'll have to pitch that one to them.

The BH's version might be called.... punch-a-douche?

heforgotme posted 4/19/2013 06:35 AM

Does anyone else believe that she is contacting me to see if we are done so she can pounce?

Possibly, or else she is just looking for any window into his life, even if it is through you.

Ignore her.