Here is the question..... How did each of you release the bitterness and go forward to new beginnings......? So close here, yet so far. I need help........
Fist meet punching bag
Foot meet punching bag.
Releases a lot of anger and bitterness.. kept me calm (not cool, I live in florida afterall) And collected.
It also made me tired so I was able to sleep.
I walk a lot. It helps to clear my head. I am also in IC and she helps me work through my emotions. And, I am pretty spiritual. I pray for God to help me forgive, let go, and move on. But mostly, I am just determined that his stupid choices will NOT dictate my future happiness. I will not let it change me into something bitter or resentful. I am choosing my attitude and not giving him that power over me.
I'd try different things and see what works/doesn't for you. Good luck!
Me: FBS (no longer betrayed nor a spouse)-62
D-day: 2007 (two years before finding SI)
S: 6/2010; D: 3/2011
I had to get very, very angry at him
It's a long road to indifference,not one us of will say it's easy but it is so freeing when you do !!!!!
[This message edited by gma56 at 1:14 AM, April 24th (Wednesday)]
I try my best to realize all the BS is about him and how HE isn't happy and is just projecting onto me.
After the initial frustration or tears or whatever is happening on my end, I end up feeling sad and then pissed off I let him get to me AGAIN, but ultimately I'm able to let it go because I know this is just a pity party on his narcissistic part. When something doesn't go his way, I get yelled at.
BUT...I'm not bitter, I'm very close to indifferent. It's just that I do have feelings and he knows just how to hurt them.
One of my way to relieve bitterness/frustration is to just try and disconnect. To focus on what I can change and do that. I try to limit my contact with things that frustrate or anger me. It's a bit of avoidance, but it usually works for me.
I'm not quite into a new beginning yet but I've always found physical labor helps to burn off aggression. You can't really do contact sports like I use (I once had an opponent tell me that I would do better if I tried to run around him not through him. Trying to run through him helps to burn off more frustration/aggression). But working in the yard, working around the house they really help. Get your body active, tire it out, it releases all those good hormones/chemicals and makes you feel better.
[This message edited by omgnome at 9:18 AM, April 24th (Wednesday)]