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mysticmoons (original poster new member #38861) posted at 7:28 PM on Wednesday, April 24th, 2013
I am a little over a month from my last DD and things are going ok. We are going to MC again this Saturday, so far it seems to be helping. WBF is still not living with me, but he is staying over 3-4 times a week and I see him just about everyday. Its kinda like we are dating again and it feels new and refreshed some how. I do wish that he would just come home! Our sex life has always been great, he never complained about not getting enough, and when we first got together I wanted it everyday. Through the years it slowed down a bit during the week but we always made up for it on the weekends. Now we are back to everyday that we see each other and we are sexting each other during the day. I am really enjoying the HB and the sexting is something new for us. I never got to see the messages between him and the other women that he had been texting and talking to on FB because he deleted them, but I am sure that there was sexting going on. It does trigger me but I try not to focus on it because I am really enjoying what we have going on right now. I have not said anything to him like " if this is what you wanted then why didn't you just tell me you wanted me to sext with you?" Or " is this what you were doing with your OWs" I see it now that this is what he wanted and its just hard to get it out of my mind that this is what he was doing and Im afraid that if he does tell me that he was sexting with the other women then I will have conformation and it will ruin it for me. I guess that I can take comfort in the fact that him and I know each other so well and know the details about what each other likes to do and have done to them that the sexting between him and the other women was not the same as the sexting between him and I. If that makse sense.
[This message edited by mysticmoons at 7:38 AM, April 25th (Thursday)]
Me: 39 BGF
Him: 45 WBF
DD#1 02/06/13 Found 6 months of texts between him and my friend
DD#2 03/14/13 Found texting between him and a 24 year old he met at his gig
DD#3 03/17/13 confessed to BJ from bar SLUT
DD#4 03/18/13 Had sex 2X with bar SLUT
jo2love ( member #31528) posted at 2:29 AM on Thursday, April 25th, 2013
mysticmoons -
Please remember to follow the guidelines when posting in Recon.
There is to be no venting about or name calling the OP in this forum.
Thank you
mysticmoons (original poster new member #38861) posted at 1:36 PM on Thursday, April 25th, 2013
Sorry, I will edit it now.
Me: 39 BGF
Him: 45 WBF
DD#1 02/06/13 Found 6 months of texts between him and my friend
DD#2 03/14/13 Found texting between him and a 24 year old he met at his gig
DD#3 03/17/13 confessed to BJ from bar SLUT
DD#4 03/18/13 Had sex 2X with bar SLUT
Knowing ( member #37044) posted at 1:50 PM on Thursday, April 25th, 2013
HB is great, we indulged until the 6 month point for sure.
More sex and sexting are fun, but don't stop there in your search for "why". Behind sex there are the WS's secret/hidden needs for things like attention, affection, validation, etc...
There is more to an A than sex, it drives me bazonkers, but my fWH swears it wasn't even about sex! He traded her sex for what he wanted/needed, because it was expected.
(I can't select the puking icon on my phone...)
BW, R last 4 years of marriage out of 15... FINALLY, HAPPILY DIVORCING!
We are in R.
jo2love ( member #31528) posted at 1:53 PM on Thursday, April 25th, 2013
Thank you. If you ever have questions, please feel free to pm a mod.
LA44 ( member #38384) posted at 1:57 PM on Thursday, April 25th, 2013
Keep sexting if you enjoy it. I know its hard. I remember doing it and "triggering" everytime thinking that they did it too (even though I didn't see it, I know they did it) but I just plowed through it until it no longer bothered me.
Knowing is right - there is more to A then sex. The three points mentioned - attention, validation, affection - we all missing from our M for a good length of time before the A started.
Me: 44
He: 47 WH
Married: 15 years
D Day: December 2012
Affair: Fall 2009 - Dec. 2011
R is not linear
idiot85 ( member #38934) posted at 2:40 PM on Thursday, April 25th, 2013
I read a few posts mentioning 'sexting' and I think I'm missing out!! I've never done that- the thing is, if I started now the Mrs would probably think I was either joking or I'd gone mad!! It's nice though if you're enjoying it.
We have been HB and I think it's a good thing- I have issues sometimes but thanks to SI I've realised I'm normal (woohoo!!)
I too take a great deal of comfort thinking about how I know my wife a load better than OM so it IS different.
Edited because the first line didn't make sense- Idiot
Oh and I just remembered!! Before we were together (not for trying on my part)
Me: "What you up to?"
Her: "too hot and bored"
Me: "I would suggest something but everything I can think of would just make you hotter"
Does that count??!! (please)
[This message edited by idiot85 at 8:46 AM, April 25th (Thursday)]
BH-32 (me)
WW-31
Multi famam, conscientiam, pauci verentur.
LA44 ( member #38384) posted at 12:16 AM on Friday, April 26th, 2013
That sounds good Idiot. But I have to say...I don't like calling you "idiot"! You need to empower yourself right now!
You can always just sext her with, "thinking of you babe/hon/love and how great last night was". It's pretty safe and there is no way she will think you are losing it! Who know what will happen from there!
Me: 44
He: 47 WH
Married: 15 years
D Day: December 2012
Affair: Fall 2009 - Dec. 2011
R is not linear
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