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Newest Member: OneLittleVictory (61821)

User Topic: hope is hard to hang onto
♀ 39046
Member # 39046
Default  Posted: 8:55 PM, April 24th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I made it a week. 7 days ago right now I was shaking uncontrollably and in an utter state of shock. Today, we have picked a real estate agent, bought out each others cars, hired an auction company, and split all the accounts. My original plan was to give it a month before making any de isions. I have only had one day where I totally broke down and cried. I think keeping busy with all this stuff allows me to put off dealing with it. I would like to reconcile and rebuild, but he is not interested I dont think. We both said we should give it time and then reevaluate. I dont know when to even start that talk. I think it should be something he initiates since he strayed. I am looking forward to my own space very much as we are all still in our house, but I dont want to put too much hope into location thinking that will take away the pain I have, but am not dealing with. Thank you to everyone for all the advice. I cant imagine dealing with this without all your help.


Posts: 26 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Nebraska
♀ 35812
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 9:38 PM, April 24th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((hugs))) I'm so sorry. This has all happened so fast for you you've got to be in a state of suspended animation while doing all of this. Until and if his head comes out of his ass, getting away so you can work on your own healing is a good idea, though. I can empathize to your feelings one minute ago, one hour ago, one day ago, one week ago, my reality was that and now it's this. (((more hugs)))

Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012

Posts: 10176 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
♂ 38518
Member # 38518
Default  Posted: 9:43 PM, April 24th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So sorry for you, Omaha (BTW - Omaha is a pretty cool city - I fly through there for work quite a bit)..

But anyway, based on your other postings, as difficult as it may be to say, I think you are doing the right thing. After all, why try to be with someone who doesn't want to be with you? That isn't really something to hang your pride on, right? He has betrayed you in the most profound of ways, and you are doing such a good thing by just letting him go. Truly, this is his loss. You deserve SO much better, and you will find better, trust me on this one. I may not know a lot (if you've ever read my threads, it's pretty evident I know.. hah), but I do know that you deserve to be treated WAY better than you have been treated, much like all of us BS'. And someone is out there waiting to do just that.

Be strong! This, too, shall pass.

BH (me): 35
WW: 34
1 kid (7 y/o)
multiple affairs spanning our entire 11-year marriage
multiple d-days over the last 3 years (most recently: 1/3/2016)
divorced and finally released from this prison: 2/26/2016

Posts: 199 | Registered: Feb 2013
Topic Posts: 3

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