It's hard to always be the doormat and feel such disrespect.
Similar things happened here, where STBXH would fix the woodstove and bang and clang and wake up the whole house. I know it's when he had to do it, but it always seemed like it was on purpose-then if we got cranky he got very angry-that was how DD and I woke up every morning for the past three or four winters, since the stove came.
I don't know why he couldn't do it after our alarm clocks, but life is only about him and his way and your H sounds kind of like that?
It took forever for me to learn the extent of manipulation STBXH had been doing and now is trying to manipulate the divorce to lessen what he did...but some things can't be minimalized.
I'm sorry for your hard time and glad your daughter is older when this is happening.
Our neighbors have a couple kids and one displays "tendancies" that he may be gay and whenever the XWH is about, the mom (BS) and Grandma make the kid hide the tendancies. It's stuff like a boy doing nailpolish and wearing jewelry or playing with dolls and it drives the dad nuts.
So they do that to try to not make waves also because the dad doesn't approve as well. But it makes me feel worry for the kid because stifling who we really are doesn't work in the long run.
We've had a few times with occassions and what parent will be with DD since the A and it's really hard. Seems like sometimes things are done or said out of spite, too?
I wish you luck.
A person is a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Suess
Perserverance and spirit have done wonders in all ages.