Thank you, everybody.
Her pain is so hard for me to see and hear and he is here for none of it, though people tell me he speaks of wanting to be a good dad.
To this day an entire year later, I relive in my mind her screams the day he abandoned us first-that she knew of, because one he came back before she woke up-those screams and her running from window to window-it haunts me and I don't think I will ever forget.
Four times he snuck or stomped off, never staying til after school to tell her himself and leaving me to do it. Naturally, he minimalizes this and even tries to say it was less times than that, but I don't accept that from him.
He speaks to people abut being a good dad and that's a two-fold thing for me, because I can't separate him from the deceipt, and he deceives her, also. He hears her cry every time he leaves her again but does it anyway.
Recently he spoke of wishing she could live with him "there" and it made me throw up. He thinks that custody and our house would be mine "because I'm the mom". But he gave that up, didn't he?
I am trying not to think too far ahead, but I think of the baby also, who doesn't even know him yet. He spoke of taking the baby "with him" to help me with nights and that made me gag. I know that he wants to replace me, but these aren't that woman's children...they're mine!
I'd better end, I feel a rant coming!
Any ideas are helpful, for that comment he made about DD living there is in my mind days later. He has said he wouldn't try to take them from me legally nor steal them, but I don't trust his words as far as I can spit.
A person is a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Suess
Perserverance and spirit have done wonders in all ages.