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Newest Member: BrnEyes777 (45750)

User Topic: Now I have humiliated my BW
thecaves
♂ 38062
Member # 38062
Default  Posted: 1:28 AM, May 5th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So it turns out that one of our friends did see the OW and I kissing at least once. My BW has not be humiliated once again because of my selfish actions and obvious stupidity.

I am planning to apologize to this friend tomorrow as I also feel my actions put them in a bad situation. Has anyone else done this? I'm sure it is something I should do and want to do. I owe it to them.


Me: WH
Her: BW
Kids: Yes
Married: 20+
D-Day: 12/2012

What defines us is how well we rise after falling.


Posts: 173 | Registered: Jan 2013
Jrazz
♀ 31349
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 1:34 AM, May 5th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think it's great that you want to try and make reparations for this. Most importantly, can you talk to your BW and find out what the least humiliating path out of this would be for her? I know that the trigger is going to be very painful for her, but approaching this as a team will make her feel like she has a little more control over the situation.


"If the path you walk leads back to yourself, you'll never get anywhere." - Master Oogway

Posts: 18337 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
thecaves
♂ 38062
Member # 38062
Default  Posted: 1:51 AM, May 5th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Jrazz, i'm on the same page as you already.

She had a lengthy discussion tonight with the friend (who now knows of the affair). Because of this conversation, she is triggering and raging pretty bad tonight. She asked for space and that is what I am giving her. I did ask if she would discuss more in the morning and discuss me apologizing to our friend. I mostly want to make sure she is ok with it.


Me: WH
Her: BW
Kids: Yes
Married: 20+
D-Day: 12/2012

What defines us is how well we rise after falling.


Posts: 173 | Registered: Jan 2013
dindy
♀ 38424
Member # 38424
Default  Posted: 1:25 PM, May 5th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I definitely think it is a good idea that you want to make amends with your friend. And it sounds like you are really committed to R with your wife.

I can understand your wife triggering as my xWS never came clean and so far I have a picture of him and OW with their pants down kissing and fumbling somewhere and it's not a good image. Who knows who could have seen them, I'll never know.

Good luck with R.


Posts: 459 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: uk
Topic Posts: 4

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