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When do I let him talk to me?

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La Traviata posted 5/9/2013 18:59 PM

After what we'll call DDay#2, I left. Haven't talked to him since except about logistics. My plan is to go 6 weeks without making decisions to give me a chance to sit with my feelings and figure out what I want to do.

When do I allow him to talk to me via email?

I can't reconcile with someone I'm not speaking to- so it has to happen. I just don't know if I'm ready.

So far he's respecting my "boundaries"

Skan posted 5/9/2013 19:18 PM

There's no right or wrong how do you feel about talking to him? Do you even want to, right now? Is the 6 weeks to be physical NC alone or complete NC? Do you want to ease into talking to him? Do you want the support of talking with a MC (assuming that you might have had one)? What do *you* want to do, feel is right? Because yeah, there's no possibility of R without talking, however you've been talking for a year and are now facing DDay#2. So talking alone isn't going to do the trick. What do you need to even want to start talking again?

blakesteele posted 5/9/2013 20:59 PM

((La Traviata))

Alls I have is an electronic hug for you. I dont even want to imagine how you must feel after 1 year of continued lying...I am only 8 months out from DD...and our path has not been linear.

If you can, try and be still and pray....allow calmness to enter you before you contemplate what the "right" next move for you is to be.

I have not mastered this, but have done it enough to know it works.

((La Traviata))

God be with you.

La Traviata posted 5/9/2013 21:49 PM

I just sent him a "you may email me now, I want to hear what you have to say" email.

We'll see.

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