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Nature_Girl posted 5/12/2013 00:38 AM

My STBX told quite a few lies on the witness stand during our divorce trial. Lies I can prove. Lies about money.

But both parties have rested their cases and it's now under advisement. The judge will make his decision when he makes his decision.

Does it matter that STBX committed perjury? Is it took late to do anything else? Not that I even know what can be done...

wontdefineme posted 5/12/2013 00:47 AM

Mine lied on the stand, but my attorney told me most do. It seems like if they can lie about you it will make them seem better. Anything to cover what they did. Mine was telling me he didn't want to be divorced but he and his attorney lied. Showed me exactly what I was in for if I stayed. I think these divorces are a pain in the judges you know what and they make their decisions based on their own prejudices and not on law. Sucks for us.

Ask your attorney, seems like they are just playing the game too and don't care. We are mortgage and house payments to them, they are numb to all the games of divorce.

Fooled Me Twice posted 5/12/2013 06:16 AM

Mine lied too about things I could prove. My atty did not file anything bc it was not worth it in the time and expense.

I would guess in your case that your EX's bs and what he's done was not lost on the judge. The judge in my case said, "it's quite obvious what's happened here with all of the "pleading the 5th" etc." I hate to say it but ultimately it didn't seem to matter in his ruling though. But I think that can differ per judge.

[This message edited by Fooled Me Twice at 6:17 AM, May 12th (Sunday)]

nowiknow23 posted 5/12/2013 13:45 PM

NG - What does your lawyer say about it?

And OMG - does this mean you're close to being done?!?

Compartmented posted 5/12/2013 19:02 PM

I'd definitely ask the attorney. It sure seems like if it pertains to money, it's important.

Is there a way to move for modification in the future? Having proof of the lies would be very interesting at that time. Hang on to your proof, anyway.

Kajem posted 5/12/2013 19:22 PM


If it is about money and things that are not part of the settlement, example - he failed to declare certain things like deferred compensation plans... there may be a statute of limitations on bringing them to court. I found out the hard way.

Ask your attorney.


Jayne Doe posted 5/12/2013 19:42 PM

I'm sure mine will too.

These cheaters have no morals, as we know.

Let me know what your L says. I may need that info!!

Nature_Girl posted 5/13/2013 14:28 PM

NIK, yes we are close, but not there yet.

I have so much proof of his lies. Reports from the doctor, bank statments, whatever. But I'm feeling utterly defeated. It probably doesn't make any difference. I feel like no one cares (no one who can do anything to help me, that is, I certainly don't mean the people here!). I am again at the cannot stop crying phase. I HATE BEING THIS LOW! I know I have to keep crawling through this mud.

I hate that I have so much evidence & proof of what a lying (perjury level lying, not just asshole lying), cheating bastard STBX is, but it doesn't actually matter. I hate that people can get away with lying under oath. I hate that I am viewed with such disdain & contempt. I hate that he is most likely going to get away with all of his cruelty & cheating & lying, and I'm left here in financial ruins. I just hate that my life is destroyed. Yes, I will rebuild my life, I will start over, I am grateful for this second chance. I just feel so terrified & alone. I need a job, I need money, I'm just feeling so scared. Scared and so angry that all of that bastard's lies are ultimately only hurting the children. By hurting them he hurts me, and that's all he cares about. It wasn't enough that he was and is a cheating bastard who did his best to destroy my soul, he also has to destroy the children's lives to make sure I stay down where he wants to keep me.

hathnofury posted 5/13/2013 14:46 PM

(((NG))) I wish I could send you a bouquet of flowers, a case of wine and chocolate.

I agree about discussing it further with the L. My guess is you can always appeal/contest, but it is a question of timing before or after, statute of limitations, which parts are worth it, etc. It may be that you should wait on the ruling before you do it, because you may not need to or it may be the key to appeal if the ruling is not acceptable. Also ask how proof of perjury can affect custody. Wouldn't it be awesome if you could get sole custody because on this?

I know it seems hopeless now, but I am sure there is a way to use this to your advantage. Even if for nothing else to prove to your adult children he is not to be trusted with finances or their kids. Hang in there, I am amazed at your strength in going through this.

Nature_Girl posted 5/13/2013 14:53 PM

I have already been awarded sole legal & residential custody of the children based on the outcome of the parenting evaluation. The kids will only be getting limited visitation with their pervert father, thank you God. What we're duking it out over now is money. Just money. He's claiming poverty, basically. He can't pay me alimony or much child support because he doesn't make enough money. Boo-fucking-hoo, you bastard, you make over ninety-K a year, you can pay me something while I try to get back on my feet financially to support these children.

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