I don't know, this seems like one of those things that will figure itself out over time. A question with no concrete answer, but what's right for you.
At first and even now, I simply had to know anything I could about OW but now I find I don't want to. I don't want to hear anything about any of it. Any of it is a trigger and actually, SBXH himself has become a trigger.
I don't know when your Dday was, but early on I was much more curious, if that helps at all. Maybe as time goes on, you won't need to know, but maybe you will. I have times or issues I need to know and can't let go of if I don't know, so it goes in a circle sometimes.
Do you think you could put it out of mind if you knew, or would it be a lot worse? Maybe some questions to ask yourself would help.
I'm sorry, but I'm skeptical that he has no info. Was he drunk? I don't know many instances where a ONS could happen without details if it was in a setting like you describe, because that doesn't seem like a sudden thing, like things that happen on the street.
And I hate the saying too, but maybe over time things will divulge themselves as sometimes happen. I know I've had some small questions answered without having to ask, when a person talks about it or DD or Perv himself lets something slip.
Discovering what really matters about life and "the situation" has helped a lot.
You gave me nothing and now it's all I've got - Bono
A person is a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Suess
Perserverance and spirit have done wonders in all ages.