Not sure if this should go here or in NB but many of us had this fear when we D or S. I know I did. WX and I had bought a house together, mortgage was in my name and I could never afford it on my own.
When we split and he left for OW/OC, I knew he would just walk away.....and he did.
I tried to keep the house going and borrowed more than $12,000 from family to do so until I just couldn't, in good conscience take any more from them.
Between credit cards, family debt and the house, I had over $300,000 in debt I couldn't pay.
I let the bank take the house, scraped together $1,500 for a lawyer and filed bankruptcy.
This was the lowest point in my life. I felt like a loser and thought I had ruined my entire financial future.
The only bright spot was when creditors called. I was able to tell them I was filing and give them my lawyer's number. I never heard from them again. Those calls, in and of themselves, are stressful and leave you feeling defeated. So not having to deal with them any more was a blessing.
I looked at what I was left with. I had a job and could pay my monthly rent and utilities....but just barely. At least I had that so I made it a point to pay my monthly bills on time. It meant Xena and I ate Ramen noodles a lot but we survived. Thank God for Mom and Auntie during Prom season and such.
We struggled, but over time, things got easier.
4 years ago, I qualified for a car loan through a finance company. The interest rate was high but at least it was something to start building credit on.
2 years ago, I traded in that car and qualified for a new loan through my bank at a good interest rate.
After that I got a couple of small store credit cards.
Last year, I qualified for a mortgage again and just now......I finally got a major credit card again, through my bank - a credit union. I can't stress enough how much it helps to build a relationship with a good credit union.
Bankruptcy didn't mean I was irresponsible. It did mean I could have made better financial decisions and taken less risk.
I will never again make financial decisions based on relying on another person's income. If I can't afford it alone, then I can't afford it.
Now that I have a major credit card, it will be the only one I'll have and, barring something big, will keep my debt to limit ratio below 30%, which should help to increase my credit score more.
So there you have it. The bankruptcy is still on my credit report and affects my score. That sucks to see and sometimes have to explain, but it doesn't have to be the end. You can recover and thrive.