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Npd-x new gf and my kid

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Chrysalis123 posted 5/17/2013 08:31 AM

Npd-x has a ruined his relationship with my younger DD16. She is his scapegoat and has been since she was 9. She is hurt and angry, but holds it together most of the time.

DD seldoms goes to his house because of this, but his house is very close to her school. One would think he would welcome visits for food and such.

His GF just moved in 6 months ago. Yesterday was one of the pop in moments. Her sister was there and the 2 had a good visit.

GF snarls at her, "Don't use this place as a pit stop. If you want to come here you need to stay overnight every now and then."

This really hurt my DD. Atleast NPD never says that out loud. DD talked with NPD and he said GF had had a bad day....yeah 40 something bitch take it out on a hurting kid.......

DD asked her dad who are you going to pick me or your gf? And sadly she already knows the answer.

[This message edited by Chrysalis123 at 11:50 PM, May 17th (Friday)]

ButterflyGirl posted 5/17/2013 09:47 AM

Geez, GF sounds like a real bitch. Talk about overstepping your boundaries. NPD should tell her to back the hell off and watch her mouth, but, well, the NPD thing gets in the way there.

Lots of hugs to you and your kids. Sounds like you have the majority of the time, so you will have the majority of influence in their life

wildbananas posted 5/17/2013 11:38 AM

Sad to say, this sounds almost identical to ex-asshat and his newish wife (not OW). They never turn the bananas away - they always say they love them and want to see them - but they're pretty snarky and mean to them at times, plus they don't spend much one-on-one time with them.

I wish I had the answer - I'm struggling with how to handle this - but I wanted to let you know I totally get it.

Poor kids. If only their fathers knew what they were doing to them and their relationship with them.

(((Chrys)))

Nature_Girl posted 5/17/2013 12:09 PM

What an incredibly mean thing to say.

Pass posted 5/17/2013 12:50 PM

Holy shit, Chrys! Who treats a kid like that?

9 is still just so little!

Your daughter is lucky to have a stable, loving mother to counteract this asshattery.

Chrysalis123 posted 5/17/2013 20:00 PM

DD is now 16, and even before this did not like GF. Said she is controlling.

I keep praying that my sweet DD learns to KNOW that this messed up behavior is not due to her.

nowiknow23 posted 5/17/2013 23:46 PM

Wow. What a shitty thing to say. (((((DD))))) My heart hurts for your DD.

Kajem posted 5/18/2013 07:42 AM

Chrysalis,

BTDT, X's NW (new wife/narc wife take your pick) has said the same things to my girls.

Then eventually stopped making the stop to see them. Now when DD1 (lives out of state) decides to go, she is basically ignored. His sister was also ignored when she visited for Christmas. His parents also.

When my girls saw them behaving the same way with the rest of his family.. they realized it wasn't them or their family. It was the NPD mindset.

Hugs for your DD and for you, it's hard to watch.

K

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