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We've been separated for over 1 year. It's time to take next step.

I was holding out, don't really know why, but I have to now.

We had an oral financial agreement from the moment he moved out, and he honored that, and even helped on some occasions with extras. We never had anything legal, because I thought he was being fair - not generous - fair.

Now that we sold the house, my son turn 18 last month, he felt that he should cut my support quite a bit, oh and this was done without the courtesy of a phone call, or a discussion. Hey I've only been his wife for 23 years - why would he give me that respect?

Made an appoitment with Lawyer for the week after DS's graduation.

He's in for a surprise, because I have been paying for OUR life insurance, OUR Car insurance, including my for my son's -which went up 250.00 a month. I also pay for both kids cell phones (both iphones) - and most kids activities/trips fees. with me making 1/2 of what he makes!

I'll be asking for all of that, plus Alimony.

And he has the nerve to say, he doesn't know how I spend the money that he "gives me" Fuck.this.Guy.

I told him, he should of thought about all of this, when he was looking for the "unknown" - his one and only excuse as to why he had the affair, to this day! These are called CONSEQUENCES buddy!

I am not looking forward to any of it.

Any advice on what to also not to forget to ask for, or what's not worth fighting for, would be greatly appreciated.

I got that response from STBX too before we had CS put in place, "I don't know how you will spend the money.." IDK jerkoff, on the kids?? You know, food, clothes, haircuts, the school lunches I solely pay for, you know, EVERYTHING for them.. Idiot..

Anyhoo, sorry for the rant.

I think you are the right track and just need to get some reassurances from your lawyer on what things to be asking for, what to forget about, etc.. I think your meeting with the lawyer will clear a lot of that up for you. And I recommend meeting with a couple of them.. If you are in for a fight, you need a bulldog. I made the mistake of hiring a mediating puppy dog of a lawyer and wasted $5,000 on him since he kept wanting me to suck it up. I'm thanking the heavens for my new lawyer. He is MUCH stronger and ready to fight for me. And unfortunately, my divorce is war. How reasonable you think your ex will be will determine what type of lawyer you need..

Good luck!

@ butterflygirl, thank you, no I like your "rants"

My lawyer is a tough biatch, but I had been thinking of switching to a mediator, thinking it would be less expensive. But you are right, it would end up costing me more, bc I am too nice, and and I would probably give in too easy.

Reasonable is not how I would describe the ex, so yes tough biatch it is....