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scotslass (original poster member #39204) posted at 3:07 AM on Monday, May 20th, 2013
I need to ask if anyone out in SI has ever dealt with this.
I am going through this right now. In December our custody was changed to 50/50 for my 16 and 17 year old. My 16 year old stole from me and has been hiding out at her dads. I have not seen her for 7 weeks now.
This is killing me. It's so much more painful than the separation and divorce. We go to court on Thursday. Any support would be welcome.
Me. - moving on and upward !!!
ruinedandbroken ( member #29250) posted at 3:10 AM on Monday, May 20th, 2013
I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. I don't have any advice but I just wanted you to know you have been heard and I hope everything goes well in court on Thursday.
“People who cheat feel that life is for the taking, and that everyone deserves happiness no matter what the cost. I must remember these tricks if I ever have my soul surgically removed."
Me: BS 42. Him: WH 41 2 Kids 8&11
Married 14 yrs Together 21
Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 3:11 AM on Monday, May 20th, 2013
http://www.amazon.com/Divorce-Poison-New-Updated-Bad-mouthing/dp/0061863262/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1369015827&sr=1-1&keywords=divorce+poison
I have this book. I think it's critical to help combat parental alienation.
Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU
little turtle ( member #15584) posted at 4:13 AM on Monday, May 20th, 2013
I missed your previous post last week with the court update. I just read it. I'm so glad you got your lawyer!!! I don't have any advice, but I'm following along. (((scotslass))
Failure is success if we learn from it.
homewrecked2011 ( member #34678) posted at 5:49 AM on Monday, May 20th, 2013
I hope you are in Dallas and get the woman judge my friend got there. WHOA she was a hard ass on the Dad for this kind of thing. he had kidnapped the 6th grader. Boy that judge let him have it! He broke court orders by doing that. You have to go to court to change visitation FIRST. Make sure you are not arguing in front of the child,,, this judge told both parents that if they argued in front of the child she would find the child new parents.
The father also lost his summer visitation bc of this AND they started doing the child swap with a 3rd party involved, that way there was a witness if the Dad did or did not show up with the child.
GOOD LUCK. The judges see creeps like your XH all the time...
Sometimes He calms the storm. Sometimes He lets the storm rage, but calms His child. Dday 12/19/11I went to an attorney and had him served. Shocked the hell out of him, with D papers, I'm proud to say!D final10/30/2012Me-55
scotslass (original poster member #39204) posted at 3:58 AM on Tuesday, May 21st, 2013
Thank you all so much for the support and help. I am going to download the Divorce Poison book right now.
Me. - moving on and upward !!!
LifeIsBroken ( member #27071) posted at 5:01 AM on Tuesday, May 21st, 2013
Your daughter is at a confused age to begin with; add the issues you're all dealing with to the mix and it's even more difficult for her to process. Take the high road with her, show grace and sanity when dealing with her. One day she will no longer be a teenager and will probably figure it all out.... then she becomes your adult daughter who gets what happened and has a better understanding of what it is that you've all had to work with.... it's likely you will get her back. Sending hugs.......
D-Day: 8/28/2009
BW: 59 @ D-Day XH: 60 @ D-Day Married 34 yrs, LIBerated: 2/17/11
Beyond terror is freedom. (Agnes Martin)
Helen of Troy ( member #26419) posted at 1:54 PM on Tuesday, May 21st, 2013
Google: Ju Jitzu parenting which I cannot spell. 
I have read tons on PA mostly I feel hopeless there are no 100% effective helpful ways to combat this horrible brainwashing thing parents do to kids. I wish there were consequences for the parent engaging in this bad behavior.
Mental health professionals usually just look the other way or la la la I can't hear you. Translation: we don't want to get involved.
windowsnotwalls ( member #36983) posted at 2:14 PM on Tuesday, May 21st, 2013
I've experienced it, but with a much younger child. You may want to check a few pages back on the NPD thread in ICR. There's another member dealing with a late teen daughter and parental alienation.
Hugs to you and strength.
Me (39): BS
Him (39): WS
Praying my way through each day.
Content (Philippians 4: 11b-13)
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