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click4it (original poster member #209) posted at 7:12 AM on Tuesday, May 21st, 2013
Every year I stress out trying to figure what I'm going to do with my boys for the summer while I work.
They have 10 days left of school and I got my calendar out trying to figure out my days off, what we can do, what I can sign them up for, etc.
It gets HARDER and HARDER the older they get.
I told my almost 16yo that IF he gives me the least bit of lip this summer, straight to his Dad's he goes. He doesn't want to go there for longer than a week, but I am not going to argue every single day either.
I told him he's going to volunteer at work with me one day a week and volunteer at my grandma's place one day a week and he had a fit.
I still need to figure out what I'm going to sign my 12yo up for.
But every year it works out somehow some way, so I'll keep my fingers crossed that it will all be just fine!
they think its going to be one big party for 2.5 months - stay up till 4am every night and eat me out of house and home. UM....NO.
Me: 45
Two boys: 20 and 17
Divorced 12-13-05
d-day 10-02-01
Laughter will cure life's ills. Have you had your laugh today?
nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 6:27 PM on Tuesday, May 21st, 2013
I HATE summer for this very reason. It's hard enough to coordinate everything - camps, activities, educational stuff... - when they're elementary aged, but the options really bottom out after that. And when your kid is special needs? Forget about it.
Good luck, click. Fingers crossed for an uneventful and positive summer for all of you.
You can call me NIK
And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane
tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 8:48 PM on Tuesday, May 21st, 2013
Now that mine are older it's not so hard. They finished school last week.
My younger one is taking summer school for the first month (started Monday) to get Health and PE out of the way for all her music classes.
That leaves the 16 yo to fend for himself. He gets chores each day, and is expected to get them done.
It's when they are both home I have trouble. They will argue over the most inane things. I am hoping DS will have his liscence and a job by then.
Me: FBSHim: FWSKids: 23 & 27 Married for 32 years now, was 16 at the time.D-Day Sept 26 2008R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.
metamorphisis ( member #12041) posted at 9:58 PM on Tuesday, May 21st, 2013
DD watches my sisters dog for her (he can't be left alone so it's daycare or a crate). So at least 4 days go to that and she earns pocket money. I send food to be fair to my sister or she'd eat every snack in sight
Between that and sleepovers, shopping trips etc it doesn't go too badly.
Ds is 9. The kid will howl that he's bored if he spends 7 seconds without activity.
I do full time daycare in the summer and it is a lot of planning to keep everyone occupied but honestly it's almost easier when there are 4 other kids here for him to play with than if it was just him. It is easier to plan trips to the park, library activities, sports etc when they are little.
We're going to plant a daycare row in the garden and grow things this summer too.
For ds between 2 sports camps, trips to Nana's etc and friends it's not too bad.
Click.. for your 12 year old .. Do you have any summer camps with a Leader in Training or Volunteer program? My siblings did them when they were around that age, and then they were trained and ready to be counsellors when they were 16 and walked right into their summer jobs
. DD is 16 and next summer she has to get a real job so I think we'll be sending her the summer camp route. She's good with kids
[This message edited by metamorphisis at 3:59 PM, May 21st (Tuesday)]
Go softly my sweet friend. You will always be a part of who I am.
click4it (original poster member #209) posted at 10:10 PM on Tuesday, May 21st, 2013
Here's my "roadblocks" my boys resist EVERYTHING I suggest for them to do. Whether it be sports, volunteering, looking for a part-time job, studying for permit...its all NO.
SO... I have to literally force everything and because of this I have to find stuff that I'm pretty sure they MIGHT like.
Problem is everything around here is VERY expensive and most camps are filled up. My fault for waiting till last minute. I got my fingers crossed for my youngest who might get into a 3 week program that is free, but he does not go to that school so he might not be selected.
Ya'll got great ideas and I see you feel my pain
as you have or are experiencing the same type of issue for the summer. It would be almost *EASIER* if I also had the summer off because then I could take the time to drive around and look for things for them to do and I won't have to hear from my mom about what I am going to do.
Me: 45
Two boys: 20 and 17
Divorced 12-13-05
d-day 10-02-01
Laughter will cure life's ills. Have you had your laugh today?
Sad in AZ ( member #24239) posted at 5:13 AM on Wednesday, May 22nd, 2013
they think its going to be one big party for 2.5 months - stay up till 4am every night and eat me out of house and home.
As long as they're not getting into trouble, I don't see the big deal. IMO, summer is for decompressing. They'll be bored after about 2 weeks and will find activities on their own. The eating out of house & home can be handled simply by not having lots snacks in the house...
However, why doesn't the 16-year old have a job?
You are important and you matter. Your feelings matter. Your voice matters. Your story matters. Your life matters. Always.
Me: FBS (no longer betrayed nor a spouse)-63
D-day: 2007 (two years before finding SI)
S: 6/2010; D: 3/2011
click4it (original poster member #209) posted at 5:23 AM on Wednesday, May 22nd, 2013
The big deal is I have to work and I want them to keep their bodies on a somewhat decent schedule throughout the summer. They are be given a lot of leeway for summer...allowed to stay up to 12am and no time limit on weekends.
My 16 yro does not have a job because he is nervous about applying for his first job. I'm starting him volunteering so that he will be more comfortable and have more references and skills to put on his applications when he does apply. I am open to him applying for a job, but I am not going to fight about it.
He may decide he wants to start applying and then I will help him.
Sure I can keep my fridge bare, but my sarcasm meant they are growing boys and they just want to eat all the time, not totally their fault, but some of it due to boredom and yep I will have to limit snacks in the house.
summer is a time to decompress, however I still believe is some kind of structure.
Me: 45
Two boys: 20 and 17
Divorced 12-13-05
d-day 10-02-01
Laughter will cure life's ills. Have you had your laugh today?
why2008 ( member #18378) posted at 6:59 PM on Wednesday, May 22nd, 2013
Here's my "roadblocks" my boys resist EVERYTHING I suggest for them to do. Whether it be sports, volunteering, looking for a part-time job, studying for permit...its all NO.
I know this is easy for me to say, but my 9 year old has always been the same way... argue, argue, argue, doesn't like anything doesn't want to do anything.
I started putting real HARD limits on myself in responding to her. Meaning if I ask her to do something and she says no. I tell her to do it one more time and if she doesn't she loses her Ipod and then refuse to engage in discussion. It's helped alot but I can SO feel your exhaustion.
Think about that counselor in training option, here in MD a friend did that for her sons through the REC department and it was almost like having a real job for them at the end of a couple of weeks, here they signed up for three week sessions. They also get put in charge of other kids so that helps them feel more important. Volunteering with you and grandma just gives your older son more chances to complain and you have to listen.
I feel your pain. I live your pain!
Me - BS - 46
Him - WS - 44
Two daughters / 10 and 7
StrongerOne ( member #36915) posted at 4:25 AM on Thursday, May 23rd, 2013
Heheheh, try the response my mom gave us: you're bored? *I'll* find something for you to do!
They don't like your suggestions? Try what I say: you don't like my ideas? Well, that's sad, so I guess you'll just have to be bored. Or do chores. Up to you.
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