My WS has been pretty darn wonderful since December. (D-day was 8-1-1012...False R 8-8-2012 'til 12-1-2012 I assume the affair started around 2-2012)
I still think about it daily, but thanks to his complete remorse, repair and openess, I am feeling somewhat better.
Honestly, I am a pretty forgiving person. I just need some sort oof half a** appology. After all, I forgave him and he is the one who took vows!I can forgive her too. I have written her a letter. I have not sent it yet. I just feel I need some sort of closure.
Have any of you written a letter to the OW? Has anyone gotten an appology? Should I send it? Here is what I wrote..
Congratulations on knowing more about MY marriage than I did. It must have felt good. I was absolutely blindsided when I found out about you and my husband. I never even suspected. Bravo! You are both talented liars! It takes a special kind of evil to lie to a woman about her marriage when you know she has six children to think of. I deserved to know what was going on.
While (WS) was off chasing rainbows and butterflies with you, I was stuck home in a living hell trying to keep my sanity while trying not to let the lives of my babies fall apart. He is not a child, if he was unhappy he should have told me so, tried to fix the problems, or left instead of lying and cheating.
I hope your life improves. I sincerely mean it for the sake of your three babies. You are a beautiful young girl, I know you were in the midst of trying to straighten up your life, get off drugs, regain custody of your kids etc when you met(WS). I pray that you will find a nice young guy with a future who truly has your best interest in mind. Don't sell yourself short. You deserve to be someone's one and only, not the one he sneaks around with and f*cks you on the side before going home to his wife
Believe me, if men are unhappy they LEAVE, they don't cheat. I hope you have learned this hard lesson. He left his first wife and I am sure if he was unhappy he would have no difficulty leaving me. I know he probably told you all kinds of lies about me and how miserable he was in order to get down your pants.
Obviously he was not that unhappy or he would be gone by now. Whenever I brought up divorce he cried like a baby. He tore up the divorce papers that I brought him TWICE while he was still seeing you. This confused the hell out of me. I was stuck not knowing which was up.
The next time you are approached by a married man, I hope you will think about the wife who is home taking care of his kids, making his supper each night, and cleaning his dirty underwear. There is a certain code of ethics between most women that includes staying away from other women’s husbands.
To me the worst thing was when you came to my home and tried to befriend my kids while I was out of town working. This is the one action that just about put me over the edge. You are a mom. How could you? My kids have been just about destroyed by this whole situation and you just rubbed their little noses in it.
I hope you are not still in the business of trying to destroy families. I hope you build a family of your own. I hope you never have to go through the pain that I have gone through. I know you could probably give two sh*ts about me, but I am a good person, and I did not deserve any of this. No woman (or man) does. My life is forever changed. I hope you will at least take the time to address this issue and possibly apologize for what happened between you and my husband. I know we all make mistakes, but it shows true character to own your mistakes and try to repair any damage that has been done through your actions.
Thank you for taking the time to read this,
[This message edited by lilflower1000 at 4:03 PM, May 21st (Tuesday)]