IGIMA, from what you've written about your wife in the past, it sounds like she has expected for a while (possibly a long time) that you will fix her and figure things out for her. The more you do that, the more she will expect it. Even more dangerous, it removes responsibility from her to do it herself. It keeps her in a lesser or victim role.
I'm not going to say this is all your wife's doing at this point. It takes two people for a dynamic like this to play out this way. This was likely also something that you brought into your marriage. You recognize it now and you will have to work on that while your wife is working on her stuff. Have you heard about Codependent No More? It's a great book.
Its being desired, It's her sharing her heart and soul with me, being vulnerable, being sexual, overall feeling happy and loving everyday.
I can understand most of that, except the last part. It's unrealistic to think that your wife can feel overall happy and loving everyday. It may even be unrealistic for your wife, whatever her baggage is, to be as vulnerable with you as you want or expect her to be. The therapist is correct, people can't change overnight.
How long you wait is up to you, but keeping yourself busy focusing on yourself and working on your issues while she is working on herself will make the time go faster.