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When they float the idea of maybe getting back together...

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fraeuken posted 5/22/2013 18:55 PM

How cruel can this X-es be?

I tried to fight for our marriage for almost 2 years. Tolerated cheating, abuse, blame shifting all in the attempt to save my marriage and family.

We have been separated for a year now, first we had in-house separation and then he finally moved out October 2012.

I am on the path to healing. Got my finances in order, are happier and stronger than in a long time and met somebody whom I really like and starting to open my heart to a little bit more.

And here is XH, NPD he is, and all of a sudden he is sending this test ballon via text if I ever saw a chance to repair our marriage?

I would rather stay on the bus and become a nun for the rest of my life than EVER touch him again. I have learned the hard way how soulless he is and why would he even think I would wnat to put myself through all this misery again? I can only explain the gull to even float the idea with him being NPD.

I find it to be just another cruel move on his part. Thank God I home come this far, I would have been much weaker just six months ago and maybe would have even considered such a proposal. Now it is Good Riddance, dear X.

Chrysalis123 posted 5/22/2013 19:00 PM

My gut reaction...he heard you were dating. He can't have you be happy or have you move on.

nowiknow23 posted 5/22/2013 19:10 PM

+1 to Chrysalis

And when you ignore or shoot down the test balloon? Well, that's pretty much an act of war.

Shields up, fraeuken.

ladies_first posted 5/22/2013 20:55 PM

and all of a sudden he is sending this test ballon via text if I ever saw a chance to repair our marriage?

A text is just a text; a passive balloon at that.

Look at his ACTIONS (preferably in your rear view mirror!).

kernel posted 5/22/2013 21:06 PM

Oh, Chrysalis nailed it on the head. Watch out for the fireworks after you ignore. And you should ignore - NC NC NC.

fraeuken posted 5/22/2013 22:03 PM

Not responding at all. Crickets all the way.

He dared to enter my house today while waiting for the girls to get ready. He gave me the 'poor me' look. I had no emotion when I saw him other than to get him out of my house ASAP.

Can't wait to see the guy I am just starting to date tomorrow night. No drama, no poor me, no manipulation, just excitement for each other.

Newlease posted 5/23/2013 08:45 AM

Same thing happened to me when I started dating. He got a big resounding NO from me. Then he had the nerve to go to our adult children and tell them that he thought I would ALWAYS be there for him.

Guess he was wrong - again.

Sending strength and peace.

NL

damncutekitty posted 5/23/2013 08:48 AM

When they float the idea of maybe getting back together...

You respond with "NO TAKEBACKS!!!"


Or just don't respond.

Everyone I date knows that I think breakups are forever. Everyone I have ever given a second chance has used it as a fresh new opportunity to hurt me again. So I just don't do it anymore.

CheaterMagnet posted 5/23/2013 15:24 PM

Definitely shields up Fraeuken! Pigfucker had the same MO. He was happy as a clam until I started dating.

Sending you Mojo.

newnormal posted 5/23/2013 16:45 PM

My x told me during a child exchange that he would still "take me back" 2 years after the D, after I moved 1000 miles away, bought a house and got engaged. Take ME back? Dude! I left YOUR sorry butt for a reason.

InnerLight posted 5/23/2013 18:27 PM

that he would still "take me back"

yeah give em a chance and they will take you right back to lying, cheating, misery and all around douchebaggery

no thank you i bought a one-way ticket out

Vulcanized posted 5/24/2013 08:06 AM

I thought you could post videos on here??? That didn't work ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_Kh7nLplWo

[This message edited by Vulcanized at 8:30 AM, May 24th (Friday)]

fraeuken posted 5/24/2013 11:58 AM

Vulcanized, LOL.

I am just ignoring it. I don't even want to validate his 'idea' with a response.

Instead I went to see my 'special' new friend last night at a Prayer Meeting, followed by a glass of wine and dinner at a beautiful bar with a view of the Pacific. Last night was spiritually and emotionally so fulfilling and rewarding, I would never ever want to go back to the despair and pain my XH brought to me.

Vulcanized posted 5/25/2013 12:06 PM

That sounds lovely, fraeuken. Glad you had a nice evening.

LotuStrong posted 5/27/2013 20:16 PM

"Instead I went to see my 'special' new friend last night at a Prayer Meeting, followed by a glass of wine and dinner at a beautiful bar with a view of the Pacific. Last night was spiritually and emotionally so fulfilling and rewarding, I would never ever want to go back to the despair and pain my XH brought to me"

It's messages like that that give me hope for dating! As WS was first everything, I'm very scared at the prospect of dating !

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