Me BS 42 Him WS 44
Is that possible?
It seems that we are in a spot that R could be going well. OW is clearly moving on, has a new significant other, and making plans. Yay me...right?
Plus my WH will not be working with her anymore. Yay me...right?
Our relationship is better. We enjoy each other's company. We have great sexual chemistry, we take walks, plan dates, hold hands, snuggle, have our shows we enjoy together, etc...
Why do I pick fights?
Is it possible to be addicted to the drama of the A? It seems I should be moving on...
I still trigger. Like this AM, my WH left for business. As soon as the alarm went off at 4am, the acid started turning in my stomach.
Now its silly really, because I do trust him with other women. It is just this particular woman that got to me. She is no longer a factor, won't be where he is etc...
But it 'reminds' me of that time...KWIM? His traveling and ignoring me. I didn't bring it up to him. Tried dealing with it on my own because I know why I feel like I do. Sometimes this feeling will make me pick a fight.
Or sometimes I will go back and relive the past...think of something, get mad and hurt and pick a fight.
I know you will tell me it takes time and I get it, but the fight picking is detrimental, KWIM? It is not helping matters.
Are there things that you guys do to help yourself in these situations? What coping strategies have you found that work? I know talking with him will be a suggestion, but I end up fighting with him if I bring it up to him. (not because of him, but because of me, it's like I get mad that he can't go back and change it)
So I am trying to find other ways to cope and maybe your suggestions will help me.
OW Coworker DDay April 7, 2012
EA on a slippery slope...
When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves. ~Viktor Frankl
"When you are happy, you can forgive a great deal."