This Topic is Archived
heartbroken_kk (original poster member #22722) posted at 3:29 AM on Wednesday, May 29th, 2013
I am blaming my Dad. This can't possibly be my responsibility. Just because I'm almost 50 doesn't mean it's on me now, does it???
OK. It's my job to grow here. I get that. I just.... don't. Why? I persist in avoiding becoming responsible with my money (or lack thereof).
I'm unemployed and have been since Dec 2011. I'm typing on my phone and really ought to open my laptop to divulge more, but suffice it to say that I am ruining my credit, living hand to mouth, racking up debt, blowing off creditors, etc. And buying good beer. It's. Just. Wrong. And I know it.
Amazonia just smack me, OK?
I am posting because this is really going to fuck up my NB, and I desperately need some support in becoming more accountable, to myself.
How do I start? 2x4s welcome and needed. I can't keep living this way.
FBW then 46, XWHNPDPAFTG the destroyer of my entire life. D-Day 1 '99, D-Day 2,3,4,5,6... '09-'11, D '15. I fell apart. I put myself back together. Forgiveness isn't required. I'm happy and healthy now, and MY new life is good.
wontdefineme ( member #31421) posted at 3:38 AM on Wednesday, May 29th, 2013
Become a Dave Ramsey listener, today,go to his website. Today is the day you take responsibility for your life, and your future. Life becomes better when you don't hide and start being an active participant.
Good luck.
LeftBehind08 ( member #38705) posted at 3:46 AM on Wednesday, May 29th, 2013
Sounds silly, but I spend irresponsibly when I am dieting. I sub shopping in place of eating. I know it and can curb it now.
Are you being financially "foolish" in place of something else to fill the void?
(probably not that easy, but if you know what trips the switch in spending, it could lead you to some self realizations...)
Sometimes it's lonely, Sometimes it's only me & the shadows that fill this room...
But it's a great day to be alive & the sun still shines when I close my eyes ~Travis Tritt
Pass ( member #38122) posted at 6:49 AM on Wednesday, May 29th, 2013
You're not a fool. I'm in the beginning stages of doing all the same stuff: Know what I should be doing; not doing it.
This is something I've been talking about with my shrink. It's a common thing to happen to depressives. I'm in therapy and taking a wackload of antidepressants, but still having problems.
You should discuss this with your doctor. Make an appointment to see your doctor right away!
Divorced the cheater and living my best life now.
The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous.
Helen of Troy ( member #26419) posted at 6:32 PM on Wednesday, May 29th, 2013
Well at least you are very brave and honest
Crescita ( member #32616) posted at 7:14 PM on Wednesday, May 29th, 2013
Sorry you are struggling (((hkk)))
I had an ostrich spell after the D, just didn't want to face reality. A year after admitting I had a problem and couldn't keep blaming the D, things are back on track and I don't have that gnawing feeling any more.
Mint really helped me feel more in control. A lot of people here have had success with Ramsey. Really just facing it will do wonders, its often not as bad as you think.
“Happiness cannot be pursued; it must ensue.” ― Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning
heartbroken_kk (original poster member #22722) posted at 4:22 AM on Thursday, May 30th, 2013
my desk is piled with receipts, unopened envelopes, junk mail, random tools, tape, stuff I have actually opened, file folders with and without labels, etc.
it's kinda a disaster. I hate going into my office.
I really run hot/cold or rather warm/frozen with my finances. When I don't have enough money to make ends meet, I freeze. I can't function even to manage the things I can afford
I guess this is another manifestation of depression. I do see my therapist almost weekly. I am trying to not grow my debt with her at least!
I wonder if this is also related to the lack of progress on D. Supposedly my P/A WH was going to file. Uh, yeah, right. I think if I want to get divorced I have to do it myself. I was the one responsible for our finances. When I "made" him do the finances he basically did what I'm doing now, which is nothing.
I hate this.
FBW then 46, XWHNPDPAFTG the destroyer of my entire life. D-Day 1 '99, D-Day 2,3,4,5,6... '09-'11, D '15. I fell apart. I put myself back together. Forgiveness isn't required. I'm happy and healthy now, and MY new life is good.
This Topic is Archived