Hang on, the ride is rough.
Is he moved out now?
I'm so sorry you are here, some people just truly don't get it at all!
It is NOT your fault. No matter how much you didn't listen, no matter how much this or that you did or didn't do, it's not your fault that he cheated. Your MC was completely wrong as well. You may own 50% of the problems in the marriage, but his decision to cheat was totally 100% his wrong decision.
Get yourself tested for STD's asap, especially if you are nursing that little baby. Get tested anyway for sure though.
You sound like a very strong woman and I know how hard this is to even begin to process, I am so very sorry.
Feel free to PM if you would like to talk.
And no matter how much you love someone, there is a line that gets crossed and it can not be uncrossed.
wish i had been as strong as you the first time when I was still young. Now it's 18 yrs later and bammo....dealing with basically the same shit but worse. His whore was 500/hr and he had a favorite. It sucks, but your doing the right thing for everyone, even your kids, what kind of daddy is that anyway...oh yeah the sucky kind my kids had.
It sounds like he is very involved with prostitutes. Please go see your doctor immediately for an STD check. Be sure to tell them what your husband has been up to so you can be tested for everything.
Then you need to shock and awe your husband. See an attorney, know your rights, then confront him. Make sure you know exactly what you want and what you are willing to accept, then stick to it.
No one wants to get divorced, but getting divorced is not worse than how you are living/feeling right now.
I first stayed for my 3 kids.
But then I realized that I owe my 2 DD and DS a better example of what they should base their future relationships on.
My daughters will not settle to be treated as an object or an option (I pray) nor will my son treat his wife like an option (I pray).
I never want them to view me as putting up with complete disrespect and BS.
I know I will always challenge them to expect the best from themselves. If I can't live it then I can't preach it.
Your husband is sick. He truly is and he is the one that needs to take the steps at healing himself. He first has to see the despair and financial burden his selfish decisions has placed on his family and then truly want to stop.
You are doing what is right for you and your daughters. Move forward and know that we are all rooting for you.
Good luck and prayers.
[This message edited by Athena1979 at 10:26 PM, June 1st (Saturday)]
You need to get checked for std's. My husband gave me herpes. I was checked for everything else and they were all negative.
Guess he'd better find himself some cheaper hookers since he'll be making child support payments, now.
Smartest thing you ever did was drop this guy like the toxic waste he is.
You'll be stronger for it, Athena. Good for you.
That being said he is getting better so far, but i'm jaded. He is a bad drunk. Sober over a year now, which is a miracle. but....i've been here before. Nearly 16 yrs since first dday but about 20 yrs since the actual first deed. (took him a while to get caught).
As for this new hooker thing a year ago...yeah, well, i'm still pissed. Even today i was pissed at him.
One thing i did do, is i googled her name (oh yeah i know everything about her, all the way down to her highschool she went to in another state)...found 3 mug shots..SERIOUSLY she looks like a model on her website profile (at 500 a pop you'd think so anyway) but airbrushing is a wonderful thing and evidently meth keeps you thin.
Her mug shots are over a 3 yr period and its like one of those FACES OF METH mug shot expo's you see on facebook....first one, healthy girl, tan and plump..second one, haggard and used with zits...third one..CRATERS in her face haggard dead eyes and omg her face...her face...holes in her face. My husband said she had scars on her face but had no idea what make up can do....I took great satisfaction of showing him her beautiful mug shots to show him what he had really been fucking...he turned green.
Do i feel sorry for her...UM...NO. do not feel sorry for them! Its thier choice to sleep with married men...so who the hell cares. I DONT. She took money out of my families budget and slept with my husband, I could care less if her crotch rots off and falls down the commode and gets flushed. I spoke with her once...she told me all kinds of good stuff. Plus on her facebook page...seriously...she has about 100 20.00 bills and about 20 100.00 bills all fanned out on her bed with a caption LIFE IS GOOD!!! on it....where do you suppose she got that money....yeah, life is good huh? Feel sorry for her??? NO...feel sorry for her victims (the wives).
BOTH parties equally guilty. If you have a drug issue, go to treatment..get help and get a JOB. period. Don't waste time feeling sorry for them!