1. Get a battle buddy or two. Trusted people that you can go to IRL to help. Also, depending on where you work, and how much trust you have in the HR department, you may want to at least clue your boss or an HR person into what is going on. You would be suprised at how often they are helpful. Where I work they actually have networks for lawyers and therapists to help with life stuff.
2. Call a lawyer and at least get an idea of what you need to do legally. Your local BAR association will be able to direct you to lawyers that will help if you dont have alot of money. Most lawyers will do free consults.
3. If you are willing to move closer to work, great. Get online and start appartment hunting, see if you can tour a few places, find out the costs of them.
4. When you find one you like, start looking at daycares in the area. Interview them.
5. You need to have copies of everything. SSN, birth certificates, the deed, all the banking information, credit card information, retirement information, stocks/bonds/CD info, utilities, phone, cable - until you are divorced you should still have everything in case you need to contact someone.
I think the biggest thing is to just start stepping. Once you realize that its not as scary as you think to step out into the world.