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I'm trying to R with my WH. He really wants to, but I'm not sure I can do this anymore. He had a PA 11 years ago and a EA about 9 months ago that I just found out about 4 weeks ago. The OW has said that she wanted a PA but that my WH wouldn't. She also said they met and talked at times while he was working. He is a police officer so it's easy for him to do that. She would talk to him about the problems she was having with her boyfriend, who is now her fiancé. They both have said the EA just kind of ended mutually. I don't know what to believe. I also don't know if I can ever be happy because of this. I feel like an idiot that I let him do ths to me again. If it was a PA he had this second time, there is no doubt in my mind I would leave him. I have no clarity on what to do. I keep thinking of the saying... Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me.

I know at 4 weeks from finding out, I couldn't even function. I swear my DS ate cookies for dinner a couple nights.

It sucks and I still have moments where I wonder the same thing.

What do YOU really want? Maybe give yourself some time. It's hard, but take care of yourself and take your time to really consider.

Hang in there.

Have you read some of the info in healing library?
Lots of great info.

Trust your gut feelings and be kind to yourself.