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When they have a pic with a wedding ring

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peridot posted 5/31/2013 00:41 AM

When someone contacts you on a dating site and they have a pic where they are wearing a wedding ring do you respond?

I've had this happen a few times and I wasn't interested anyway so I just ignored them. However, today I received a message from someone that I might be interested in but he's wearing a ring. Suggestions?

wannabenormal posted 5/31/2013 01:02 AM

I'm not here yet, but I would ask - what's up with that?

Maybe it's a really good pic (knowing me, I would totally make it my profile if I loved) but can't you photoshop that out?

Kinda odd?

Crescita posted 5/31/2013 01:03 AM

Is this one pic or one of many? He might just be guilty of liking an old photo. If he has a ring in all of them I'd be more concerned.

Crescita posted 5/31/2013 01:03 AM

Double post

[This message edited by Crescita at 1:04 AM, May 31st (Friday)]

peridot posted 5/31/2013 01:14 AM

He has 2 pictures and in both he is wearing a ring. He's also military and both pictures look like they were taken when he was overseas maybe.

I haven't responded to him yet so I don't know where he is right now. I just know that I have heard of military men chatting with women online while they are overseas and married.

wannabenormal posted 5/31/2013 01:18 AM

I would totally ask.

Even if all my good pics were when I was married, I could someone (like good Lord, a neighbor, the security guard at work?!) to shoot one of me without my rings for a dating site profile.

Sounds blech to me.

SeanFLA posted 5/31/2013 02:02 AM

I just know that I have heard of military men chatting with women online while they are overseas and married.

Ummm yep...cause my ex WW's AP was one of them.

Amazonia posted 5/31/2013 05:22 AM

Guilty.

I had a wedding ring on in one of my pics when I was OLD. We were only married six months, so it wasn't even a very old picture.

I didn't even think about or notice it until a guy pointed it out.

Oops!

(I swapped it for a new pic when he did)

lostmommy posted 5/31/2013 10:46 AM

I'd definitely bring it up. Two pictures and they both have him with a wedding ring? Weird.

osxgirl posted 5/31/2013 10:56 AM

It could be that he's a player - or it could be that he's just clueless about small details like that, and either didn't realize the pictures showed that, that anyone would notice, or that it could be a problem to anyone.

The only way to know is ask. The only problem with that is - if he tells you it's an old picture, that he's divorced, do you believe him? There are some players that lie about it, of course.

My first instinct would be to just pass. But if you are interested enough to give him a chance to explain, you need to be very careful - don't get too invested in anything until/unless you get to know him a lot better and meet friends/family, see his home, etc.

notmeanymore posted 5/31/2013 12:53 PM

I'd ask.

At some point you are trusting people to a certain degree.

If the guy isn't wearing a ring in the photo you're trusting he's not married. It doesn't mean a thing.

Even after he tells you why he used those photos, at some point you have to decide to believe it or not.

If you are actually interested I say have the conversation at least.

peridot posted 6/1/2013 19:34 PM

I've decided that I'm going to just ignore him and move on.

hurtbs posted 6/1/2013 22:01 PM

At the very least it means that they have old photos up on the site. You can ask about it if they otherwise seem interesting - but make sure you get updated pics!

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