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Newest Member: JulyLady (61478)

User Topic: This explains why I'm not dating and Stbx is engaged.
♀ 33698
Member # 33698
Default  Posted: 11:35 AM, May 31st (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just in case you're feeling down because your remorseless ex appears to have more "luck" (and I use that word loosely) than you in the dating/marriage game:

I was glad to read this since my STBX is NOT conventionally attractive: "Dufner offered some caveats about the research, though. 'We were not able to directly test the causality underlying the association between narcissism and physical attractiveness,' he said."

Bottom line? They're fun for a while, but they're not the steady, enduring types that we all hope for. I think it's helpful to remember that.

FBS; now happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

Posts: 4079 | Registered: Oct 2011
♂ 26023
Member # 26023
Default  Posted: 10:08 PM, May 31st (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Seems obvious to me that women are more generally drawn to narcissists. Without question, the number one trait women list as desirable in their dating profile is that the man be confident, self-assured. I'll never understand why this is such an aphrodisiac, but it sure makes dating a very fertile ground for the fat-headed men of the world. Of course, the profiles all qualify the desire for confidence by adding "but not arrogant," which only underlines that there is difficulty distinguishing between the two.

Personally, I think Hollywood has a lot to do with the foolhardy romantic desires of both men and women.

BH, now divorced

Posts: 3529 | Registered: Oct 2009 | From: New England
♀ 27457
Member # 27457
DOH!  Posted: 10:48 PM, May 31st (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes...I am a freakin butt magnet for narcissists and cocky jacknutts....

"Sometimes your knight in shining armor just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12

Posts: 2767 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
♂ 26023
Member # 26023
Default  Posted: 11:22 PM, May 31st (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Men are no more enlightened (of course). Considering the divorce rate, the level of infidelity and general unhappiness with our partners, we're a society of fools when it comes to relationships.

I'm only just beginning to realize I wasn't all that interested in the sacrifices involved in a relationship while I was dating. Fortunately I failed to get involved with anyone.

[This message edited by OnceInALifetime at 11:32 PM, May 31st (Friday)]

BH, now divorced

Posts: 3529 | Registered: Oct 2009 | From: New England
♀ 36870
Member # 36870
Default  Posted: 4:33 AM, June 1st (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Pretty sure that article was written about my EXH!

I'm totally drawn to quiet creative types now. He's smashed the appeal of narcs right out of me.

D-Day mid 2012
I was the BS
Status: Divorced early 2013

Posts: 439 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: England
♀ 18334
Member # 18334
Default  Posted: 7:39 PM, June 1st (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

After the hell I have been through, I have become very picky. I may never have another relationship lol and I'm okay with that. It's been just me and the kids for over 5 years. Maybe I've just been single for too long.

I think...therefore, I'm single.

It is what it is.

Posts: 4939 | Registered: Feb 2008
Topic Posts: 6

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