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Newest Member: BrnEyes777 (45750)

User Topic: My (younger) brother had a stroke
Sad in AZ
♀ 24239
Member # 24239
Frustrated  Posted: 12:00 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ugh. He's been a very angry man for the past, maybe, 6 years. He was drinking excessively. He woke up two Sundays ago unable to see. The stroke has affected only his eyes, but it's to the point that he has only pinpoint tunnel vision (if he tries to read, he can see the word, but when he moves on to the next one, he can no longer see the first one.)

Mom is still slowly slipping into dementia; she is taking medication for it, but at night, she gets pretty wonky. She keeps talking about the kids never telling her where they're going and not coming home for dinner (she lives alone... )

My sister-in-law has been a doll--she does all kinds of things for mom including cleaning up her yard, and mom hates her. Now, SIL is going to have to devote more time to my brother, so mom's situation is going to have to change.

I almost have her convinced to move into a senior facility, but she's very paranoid (this is her normal, nondementia state) and while she wants friends, she doesn't know how to be one (never has.) She disclosed that she's come into 'a lot' of money; before I moved to TX, we moved all of her accounts from NY to AZ, so I don't know where this one came from, but she claims it's an investment account. When I asked her how much, she said, "I'm not telling you!"

Some good thoughts would be appreciated.


I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 20453 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
Deeply Scared
♀ 2
Member # 2
Default  Posted: 12:02 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Sad))) Sounds like alot is going on in your family...good thoughts to you and all involved


"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.


Posts: 198861 | Registered: May 2002
itainteasy
♀ 31094
Member # 31094
Default  Posted: 12:06 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((((Sad)))))))

I'll keep your family in my prayers..


Posts: 3425 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: NWPA
ajsmom
♀ 17460
Member # 17460
Default  Posted: 12:07 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Argh. What a plateful.

Prayers for your family.

(((SiA)))

AJ's MOM


Fidelity isn't a feeling...it's a choice.

"Truth has no special time of its own. Its hour is now - always." - Albert Schweitzer
____________________________________________
Me: BW - Him: 200+ # tumor removed 7/09
DS - 31 - Yikes!


Posts: 21103 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: Been Through Hell...On My Way Back
sullymeishadomi
♀ 16305
Member # 16305
Default  Posted: 12:11 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((sad))


People tell you exactly who they are...why expect them to be what they are not ....will be divorcing the selfish creep.

Posts: 8471 | Registered: Sep 2007
Tred
♂ 34086
Member # 34086
Default  Posted: 12:13 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Damn Sad, sounds like a lot going on. Sending good thoughts your way.


Married: 17 years (14 @JFO)
D-Day: 11/09/11
"Ohhhhh...shut up Tred!" - NOT the official SI motto (DS)

Posts: 4090 | Registered: Dec 2011
simplydevastated
♀ 25001
Member # 25001
Default  Posted: 12:14 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I feel for you, I really do. My grandmother had alzheimer's. It's hard to see someone going through that. I went over to help her one day, she walked from the kitchen to the living room then back to the kitchen and didn't know who I was.

An assisted living facility would be a good idea for your mom. They have people that can go in and check on her form time to time and it's not quite a nursing home.

Is your brother getting some kind of treatment for his stroke? How old is you brother, if you don't mind my asking.

Sending (((HUGS))) and positive thoughts your way.


Me - BS, 39 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS10, DD7
Married, for now... (4+ D-Day - listed in profile.)

Posts: 5854 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: In the darkest depths of hell!
GabyBaby
♀ 26928
Member # 26928
Default  Posted: 12:16 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hugs and positive thought for you and your family.


Me - 42
SorryInSac (STBX WH#2) - 47. DDay 7/12/14
Married 4, together 7yrs total
Status - Done

DD(21), DS(18, PDD-NOS)
6 Furkids - 4 dogs, 2 cats

WXH (serial cheater, 12+ OW) - Legally married 18yrs

I edit often for clarity/typos.


Posts: 6690 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: California
jo2love
♀ 31528
Member # 31528
Default  Posted: 12:18 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Sad)))

I'm sorry for all you and your family are going through. Sending you strength and good thoughts.


Posts: 36474 | Registered: Mar 2011
wildbananas
♀ 10552
Member # 10552
Default  Posted: 12:22 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You got it!

(((Sad)))


Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light. ~ Yogi Bhajan

Posts: 15435 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: Now an AZ girl
authenticnow
♀ 16024
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 12:23 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Sad)))

Sending lots of good thoughts your way.


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 38696 | Registered: Sep 2007
lieshurt
♀ 14003
Member # 14003
Default  Posted: 12:25 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm so sorry. Sending good thoughts your way.


A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere.

Posts: 13838 | Registered: Mar 2007 | From: Houston
TrulyReconciled
♂ 3031
Member # 3031
Default  Posted: 12:39 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sad, I'm very sorry to hear that news.


"In a time of deceit, telling the Truth is a revolutionary act."

Posts: 21449 | Registered: Dec 2003 | From: Hell and back, way back :o)
nowiknow23
♀ 33226
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 12:43 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((Sad)))) Holding you and your family in my thoughts. Hang in there, honey.


You can call me NIK

"Keep your face always toward the sunshine - and shadows will fall behind you."
-Walt Whitman


Posts: 26196 | Registered: Aug 2011
jrc1963
♀ 26531
Member # 26531
Default  Posted: 12:49 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((SAD)))

That's a lot to handle. How are you taking it all?

I hold you in my thoughts while you deal with all this.


Me: BSO - 46
Him: FWSO - 69
DS - 13
D-Day - 12-11-09,
R - he finally came home
Your life is an Occasion. Rise to it. - Mr. Magorium, "Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium"

Posts: 24672 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Florida
FaithFool
♀ 20150
Member # 20150
Default  Posted: 1:36 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Sad)))


DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire

Posts: 17708 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: Canada
bbee
♀ 17840
Member # 17840
Default  Posted: 1:39 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Sad)))


This above all: to thine ownself be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Hamlet, Act I, Scene 3

Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.

All's Well That Ends Well, Act I, Scene 1


Posts: 6656 | Registered: Jan 2008 | From: SE US
still2suspicious
♀ 31722
Member # 31722
Default  Posted: 2:57 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sending you strength, Sad.


Me: BS
Him: WH
DDay: LTEA

Posts: 1330 | Registered: Apr 2011 | From:
jadedangel
♀ 26979
Member # 26979
Default  Posted: 3:54 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((Sad))

I hate to hear that about your brother. Sounds like your sister in law will be real busy with him.

Your mother sounds like she "Sundowns". For some odd reason most dementia affected people tend to start getting worse with their symptoms at evening/night. In my opinion, I think a nursing home would be in her best interested but then again, it does depend on how far gone she is in the disease process.

IF she tends to get easily distracted, cannot hold her concentration for long periods of time, falls a lot, basically just not able to take care of her daily needs, these are things that really have to be looked at. Is she able to meet her basic needs without the assist of someone?


DDay: I can't remember but there were more than one

Divorced 06/2007

EXWH passed away 8/31/2011


Posts: 428 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: AL
SoVerySadNow
♀ 36711
Member # 36711
Default  Posted: 4:27 PM, June 4th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wishing you only positive things. I'm sorry you are dealing with so much.


Me:BW
Him:WH
D-day(s),after years of TT and Gaslighting was Labor Day Weekend 2012, continuing for a week after. *Dammit! More TT 3/9/13
Really trending toward D- planning about it is my "happy place" now.

Posts: 1292 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Sunny Florida
Topic Posts: 30
Pages: 1 · 2

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