Cookies are required for login or registration. Please read and agree to our cookie policy to continue.

Newest Member: BabaA

Off Topic :
Please help me brainstorm activity ideas for my injured dad

This Topic is Archived
default

 I think I can (original poster member #17756) posted at 8:54 PM on Tuesday, June 4th, 2013

My 70 yr old dad just hurt his shoulder and maybe spine in an accident, has to have surgery, and now can't fish or play golf all summer. He's an active guy--a "doer" and this is going to drive him crazy, plus the "facing mortality" aspect of the whole thing.

I could really use some ideas of big or little activities he could do. He likes to make things. He spends most of the winter in his woodshop. He does have money, so don't let that limit your suggestions.

Thanks so much. This is going to be really hard on him.

I'm not the winner, I'm the prize.

posts: 9046   ·   registered: Jan. 14th, 2008
id 6361391
default

nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 8:57 PM on Tuesday, June 4th, 2013

What are his specific limitations?

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6361394
default

notmeanymore ( member #9772) posted at 9:09 PM on Tuesday, June 4th, 2013

My Dad is in his early 80's and has gotten into painting pictures and making his own frames (cutting/staining the wood).

Not sure if he could try that?

"Put the cuckoo back in the clock baby" - Four Brothers

posts: 912   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2006
id 6361413
default

nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 9:20 PM on Tuesday, June 4th, 2013

Any interest in photography? Genealogy?

My dad is an engineer - a problem solver at heart, and he came alive when he picked up genealogy while he was recovering from double-hip replacement. He said it was the best puzzle he ever tried to solve. There's a wealth of information online, and it's fairly easy to get started.

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6361428
default

 I think I can (original poster member #17756) posted at 9:33 PM on Tuesday, June 4th, 2013

It's rotator cuff surgery--I don't really know how bad at this time. His dominant hand, of course. He was thrown from a horse. Possible spine compression--no surgery just rest for 6 weeks.

So I'm thinking shuffling around and he'll be able to do simple hand stuff, but not pressure or swinging or pulling for a long while.

Maybe small wood stuff like frames, thanks notmeanymore. And I'll ask about the photography and geneology--he does like to learn how to do new things. He is an engineer too!

Maybe he could take pictures of the activities he can't do right now......

He's also into astronomy and history......

I'm not the winner, I'm the prize.

posts: 9046   ·   registered: Jan. 14th, 2008
id 6361439
default

lost_in_toronto ( member #25395) posted at 9:42 PM on Tuesday, June 4th, 2013

My dad always does cross stitch when he is convalescing. It keeps him busy and he can do it for short periods of time when he is in pain or tired. Maybe your dad could try something like that if his injury allow for it?

Me: BS/48
Him: WS/46
DDay: August 23, 2009
Together 23 years.
Reconciled.

posts: 1806   ·   registered: Sep. 2nd, 2009   ·   location: not toronto anymore
id 6361453
default

nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 9:53 PM on Tuesday, June 4th, 2013

He is an engineer too!

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6361463
default

Bigger ( Attaché #8354) posted at 11:57 PM on Tuesday, June 4th, 2013

What sort of fishing does he do?

If it’s fly-fishing then fly-tying is an ideal hobby. It’s relatively simple to start tying easy flies, not overtly expensive (start-up can be from 50 bucks, a good startup 100-150).

If he’s really good with his hands then rod-building. That’s where he buys a blank and builds the rod.

"If, therefore, any be unhappy, let him remember that he is unhappy by reason of himself alone." Epictetus

posts: 13180   ·   registered: Sep. 29th, 2005
id 6361584
default

Lucky2HaveMe ( member #13333) posted at 12:03 AM on Wednesday, June 5th, 2013

My H had rotator cuff surgery. It is PAINFUL and the recovery LONG. He had his surgery in the winter and had zero interest in doing much of anything. Heck the PT and home exercises will keep him busy!

My H did get seasons of shows on DVD from Netflix and the library...

Is your dad a reader? Computer literate? Would a tablet with OK internet access be appealing? Ebooks? Apps/games?

Love isn't what you say, it's what you do.

posts: 8488   ·   registered: Jan. 18th, 2007   ·   location: WNY
id 6361589
default

Kajem ( member #36134) posted at 1:31 AM on Wednesday, June 5th, 2013

If history is his hobby, geneology is a very good activity. There are usually groups of interested people who meet at the library or local historical society to compare notes, help with town research... etc.

Good luck.... It is so hard to keep busy when your laid up...

I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - UnknownRelationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

posts: 6708   ·   registered: Jul. 15th, 2012   ·   location: Florida
id 6361674
default

purplejacket4 ( member #34262) posted at 2:04 AM on Wednesday, June 5th, 2013

Wow! My Dad's a retired engineer also. Weird.

Is there any volunteer work he could do? Visiting shut ins, meals on wheels, etc. My dad has been teaching prisoners in his retirement.

Me: BS 50
Her: FWS 53 (both family med MDs; together 23 years)
OW: who cares (PhD)
Dday: 10/11: 11/11 TT for months; NC 8/12
Limboconsiliationish
"band aids don't fix bullet holes" Taylor Swift
I NEVER mind medical ???

posts: 3013   ·   registered: Dec. 20th, 2011   ·   location: Here
id 6361718
default

 I think I can (original poster member #17756) posted at 3:10 AM on Wednesday, June 5th, 2013

Bigger, he does fly fish--that's great!! He could totally tie ties. I can see him doing that. I'll find an introductory kit...rod building too. He makes duck calls already.

lost-in-toronto--I was thinking about knitting. Cross stitch also would work.

Lucky2haveme-thanks for the info on recovery. It sucks cause he had several big things he was planning on this summer. He is a computer guy--I got him a cheap 3d printer for his birthday and he's been noodling around with that.

purple he's not really a volunteer--kind of either a loner or a orderer-arounder

Thanks all of you--very helpful!!

I'm not the winner, I'm the prize.

posts: 9046   ·   registered: Jan. 14th, 2008
id 6361808
default

Sad in AZ ( member #24239) posted at 3:23 AM on Wednesday, June 5th, 2013

Knitting might be too much for the rotator cuff unless he learns continental style. Cross stitch might also be too much.

Fly tying sounds great. How about woodburning too?

Good luck!

You are important and you matter. Your feelings matter. Your voice matters. Your story matters. Your life matters. Always.

Me: FBS (no longer betrayed nor a spouse)-63
D-day: 2007 (two years before finding SI)
S: 6/2010; D: 3/2011

posts: 25351   ·   registered: Jun. 3rd, 2009   ·   location: Arizona
id 6361830
default

Dreamboat ( member #10506) posted at 3:48 AM on Wednesday, June 5th, 2013

My Dad was also into woodworking and he made a few small book display racks for the local library Similar to this but not as fancy (no rounded edge or fancy insert) (I should also mention that the librarians loved him because of this :) https://www.google.com/search?q=book+rack+wood+working&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=LKKuUfqYOYi0rQG3xoG4DQ&ved=0CFwQsAQ&biw=1440&bih=797#tbm=isch&sa=1&q=wood+working+small+book+rack+&oq=wood+working+small+book+rack+&gs_l=img.3...52796.57993.0.59168.11.10.1.0.0.0.171.669.9j1.10.0...0.0...1c.1.15.img.EjM5ki6DFr8&bav=on.2,or.r_cp.r_qf.&bvm=bv.47380653,d.aWM&fp=47366c0356aa7522&biw=1440&bih=797&facrc=_&imgrc=rd6LM2jsM7V8tM%3A%3BC4g0tK4v-h9qDM%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Ffarm9.staticflickr.com%252F8518%252F8405687283_12480f1f58_z.jpg%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fwww.flickr.com%252Fphotos%252Fpauljamesward%252F8405687283%252F%3B612%3B612

That may be beyond what your father can do with his injury, I don't know.

He also used to volunteer at the senior center and consult and do taxes for the seniors. I know tax season is over, but there may be some other things at the senior center (or library) that you Dad could help with. Something that will allow him to use his analytical brain and feel useful. Or he may be able to find another activity that he enjoys, like cards. Most communities have a senior center.

Crossword puzzles, Sudoku, or jigsaw puzzles may keep him busy during his early convalescence. Others have mentioned genealogy.

Swimming is a physical activity that is low stress to the joints. He can ask his physical therapist about other physical activities that he can do.

HTH

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off
-- Shake It Out, Florence And The Machine

posts: 17695   ·   registered: Apr. 25th, 2006   ·   location: A better place :)
id 6361850
default

dazdandconfuzed ( member #11692) posted at 2:47 PM on Wednesday, June 5th, 2013

He was thrown from a horse. Possible spine compression--no surgery just rest for 6 weeks

Never had shoulder surgery although I hear it can be pretty brutal. But I have been thrown from a horse and had a compression fracture of the spine. How recent was his accident? Are the xrays inconclusive - is that why you say possible? Cuz I have to tell you - the only hobby I had for about 2 months after was pain management. The only way I was able to talk around my nurse case manager's suggestion that I go to a rehab hospital once I was release from the "regular" hospital was agreeing to have a visiting physical therapist come to the house 3x per week.

It sounds like your dad's spinal involvment might not be as severe as mine - but I don't know if I'd worry too much about activities just yet, but maybe things he can do with extremely limited movement and maybe high as a kite (pain meds, lol!). For example I have a kindle fire that I can wirelessly download movies to and it can come with me into the bedroom or the couch or chair if I have to move around. Maybe a netflix subscription for some old movies or something? Once he's up and around again, just taking a walk can be exhausting but actually can help manage the back pain (hurts less if you get up and walk as often as possible).

Send your dad lots of healing mojo.

Me - BW
Him - WH

posts: 6621   ·   registered: Aug. 15th, 2006   ·   location: Massachusetts
id 6362164
This Topic is Archived
Cookies on SurvivingInfidelity.com®

SurvivingInfidelity.com® uses cookies to enhance your visit to our website. This is a requirement for participants to login, post and use other features. Visitors may opt out, but the website will be less functional for you.

v.1.001.20250404a 2002-2025 SurvivingInfidelity.com® All Rights Reserved. • Privacy Policy