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timeforchange (original poster member #27454) posted at 5:27 AM on Wednesday, June 5th, 2013
This weekend DS9 will make his First Holy Communion.
I am divorced and have been apart from ex wh for 3.5 years. He lives with OW. I have never met her..... Or seen her. But I will do this weekend at the restaurant after the church ceremony.
I keep waiting to have emotions or trepidation about this meeting... But am happy to report I feel nothing.
This is what indifference feels like.
3 years ago I would never have imagined simply not caring about meeting her. Time is a wonderfu thing.
I am actually very grateful to her... She played a part in releasing me from a hellish, abusive marriage. Am quite tempted (but won't) to thank her!!!
My life today is wonderful. Full of laughter, happiness and joy. I give thanks everyday for this beautiful 2nd chance in life.
Meeting OW is a total
Non event and that feels good.
Me = BS aged 43
2 boys, 13 and 9
DDay 1/19/10
Confronted him 2/16/10
Finally Divorced 8/29/12
“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.”
sadtoo ( member #2027) posted at 5:45 AM on Wednesday, June 5th, 2013
persevere ( member #31468) posted at 5:59 AM on Wednesday, June 5th, 2013
I really wish we had a LIKE for posts - because this one is just awesome timeforchange. 
I'm closer to where you are every day and I love that. I also occasionally consider the hell that I lived with for so long is now OW's hell...lol...and that can't help but make me smile. 
Hold your head up high lady and handle yourself as I know you will - that you are free and she is now the imprisoned one.... 
DDay:2011
Status: D 2011
Remarried to a kind and wonderful man - 2017
Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron
It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K.
cmego ( member #30346) posted at 1:46 PM on Wednesday, June 5th, 2013
me...BS, 46 years old.
Divorced
better4me ( member #30341) posted at 5:37 PM on Wednesday, June 5th, 2013
This is what indifference feels like.
DDay 11/17/2010 BW:58
Happily remarried!
CallMeRed1 ( member #36870) posted at 5:40 PM on Wednesday, June 5th, 2013
D-Day mid 2012
I was the BS
Status: Divorced early 2013
MissD ( member #39377) posted at 11:38 PM on Wednesday, June 5th, 2013
I really wish we had a LIKE for posts - because this one is just awesome timeforchange.
Agree, very nice!
kernel ( member #27035) posted at 12:07 AM on Thursday, June 6th, 2013
"On particularly rough days when I'm sure I can't possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100% and that's pretty good."
Mousse242 ( member #6330) posted at 1:12 AM on Thursday, June 6th, 2013
You can always thank her for taking the SOB off your hands.
FieldsOfLavender ( member #39154) posted at 3:32 AM on Thursday, June 6th, 2013
I look forward to the day that I will be where you are timeforchange.
okaynow ( member #13813) posted at 6:02 AM on Thursday, June 6th, 2013
Married 18 yrs, together 25+.
D-day: 2/18/07.
1 child
The story doesn't really matter anymore. Time is a great healer. Life is good.
movingforward777 ( member #6850) posted at 6:48 AM on Thursday, June 6th, 2013
It is wonderful when you reach the point where you don't give a rat's ass what they are doing or who they are doing it with.....
Always take the high road...although you would love to tell her a few things you are so much the bigger person for not doing it....
Let the focus be on your son and his first communion...you don't have to sit with your exH and his wife at the restaurant...you can put yourself at the far end of the table away from them, surround yourself with family you can talk with, and enjoy the celebrations!
I'm happy for you that you have reached the "indifference" stage...it makes life so much easier when you don't have an emotional response to everything your exH is doing/saying.....HUGS
You can't reach for anything new if your hands are still full of yesterday's junk.......Louise Smith
NeverAgain2013 ( member #38121) posted at 4:58 PM on Thursday, June 6th, 2013
I would absolutely hand her a small bouquet and thank her verbally for playing a role in what's turned out to be the very best time of your life.
Yeah, I'm a bitch like that.
Be careful - that 'knight in shining armor' may very well be nothing more than an assclown wrapped in tin foil.
ME: 50+ years old and cute as a button :-)
Ex-WBF: Just a lying, cheating, gravy-sucking pig - and I left him in 2012.
stronggirl72 ( member #37293) posted at 7:49 PM on Thursday, June 6th, 2013
I would absolutely hand her a small bouquet and thank her verbally for playing a role in what's turned out to be the very best time of your life.
^^^
"Taking the high road, and doing it with class."
DIVORCED!!
Beemer ( member #38499) posted at 8:01 PM on Thursday, June 6th, 2013
BW - Me (33)
FWH - Him (34)
Married - 8years
D-Day - 06/06/12
Status - Trying...things are good :)
tryingagain74 ( member #33698) posted at 8:03 PM on Thursday, June 6th, 2013
That's so great to hear. I hope that I can reach that goal as well.
FBS; now happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley
Gr8Lady ( member #36307) posted at 8:16 PM on Thursday, June 6th, 2013
Such powerful words. I personally thank you for sharing.
My mother used to say "blessing in disguise" as message of encouragement.
OW significantly did you a favor and your life is once again joyful
Congratulations to your DS9 important life milestone!!!!!
BS: Me (70yo)FWH: HIM (72 yo)) serial infidelities over past 35 years
DD: Multiple unconfirmed until 2013
friends wife lasting 10 years. TT over a
year a year. Now his health is declining,
among the lack of communication.
timeforchange (original poster member #27454) posted at 11:38 AM on Friday, June 7th, 2013
Ah thanks for all the funny and touching comments.
Must confess am torn between thanking her, wishing her luck (he is non-medicated bi polar) or telling her to run!!!! She is very young (20 years his junior)!!
Won't do any of those though...
Will enjoy the day... And Before we meet the ex, ows and horrendous ex inlaws in the evening we have 45 friends and family at home in the afternoon.
That will be the true celebration and my way of thanking all those who supported us and befriended us over the last 3.5 years.
Hoping to see more of you here in Indifference Land very soon.
Me = BS aged 43
2 boys, 13 and 9
DDay 1/19/10
Confronted him 2/16/10
Finally Divorced 8/29/12
“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.”
BoardPearl ( member #25463) posted at 4:35 PM on Friday, June 7th, 2013
Isn't it wonderful? That feeling of indifference.
I have met OW at drop offs a couple of times, and we are friendly (they live in another country so it isn't often). I was scared to death to meet her two years past Dday, but it felt great afterwards. I was done with the wondering.
Congratulations on your DS Holy Communion!
homewrecked2011 ( member #34678) posted at 5:04 AM on Sunday, June 9th, 2013
Sometimes He calms the storm. Sometimes He lets the storm rage, but calms His child. Dday 12/19/11I went to an attorney and had him served. Shocked the hell out of him, with D papers, I'm proud to say!D final10/30/2012Me-55
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