Topic: Heavy Heart - heart aching??
Member # 11919
| Posted: 3:21 AM, June 6th (Thursday), 2013|
Hello all....well, I think that I am finally experiencing a VERY much delayed physical sadness, but I want to check with you guys who are "normal" grievers. I have had a fear of sadness (anxiety associated) my whole life for reasons due to past traumas. I covered all up with anger, although believe me...I have cried ALOT, I don't think all the sadness got out, ya know? Anyways...did you or do you have an actual physical heavy heart feeling when you are sad...aching sort of in the left chest area?? I have also had palpitations recently and an increased heartbeat from time to time. In case you are wondering....I will be seeing my doctor as well, but where I'm at in my trauma therapy as well I had a trauma release massage about 3 wks ago and WOW....is all I can say...either I've got some new anxiety symptoms which have surfaced, or I've got some "stuck" emotions in my body finally coming out (nearly 7 yrs later plus childhood repressed stuff).
Tell me, did you feel physical sensations in your heart area with sadness feelings/triggers...the only I have ever felt in the past was wanting to cry, but no actual physical feelings.
Together 23 yrs. 1 son 9 yrs old
TT until Nov 06
False R until Jan 08-too much anger/defensiveness, lack of consistent support from him
S- Jan 08-July 08
Aug 08-Fall 2011-rugsweeping
back in MC and IC trying
Posts: 503 | Registered: Sep 2006 | From: Canada
Member # 36654
| Posted: 3:31 AM, June 6th (Thursday), 2013|
Yes. I have had some heart symptoms and have been checked out by a cardiologist. Mostly I just have an empty feeling in my body, like something is missing. The body does weird things when you add a lot of stress and anxiety. Mine has brought out an autoimmune response where I developed antibodies that attack my platelets. So now when I start to bleed anywhere internally (normal) I can't stop bleeding on my own. This all started about a month after DDay#1 and I almost died from it twice since then.
Do not ignore your body. It is telling you that something is not right. ((HUGS))
Me-53 XWH#2-54 NPD, alcoholic
M-11yrs T-12yrs LTA-5yrs D-8/11/15
11/28/14 "Assault with a deadly weapon" and is now with OW
"A person is either an asset or a lesson"
"Changing who you are with does not change who you are"
Posts: 6628 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Texas
Member # 37190
| Posted: 7:15 AM, June 6th (Thursday), 2013|
While I agree a trip to the doc is a good idea, I so have this. It feels like an elephant sitting on my chest. Heart feels like its racing and then sometimes, like my guts are being ripped out. All three combines sucks.
If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck - it's not a fluffy pink unicorn squirting liquid rainbows, complete with pots of gold out of it's ass.
Posts: 771 | Registered: Oct 2012 | From: Nowhere pretty
Member # 37107
| Posted: 9:26 AM, June 6th (Thursday), 2013|
Yes I have had this too.
Together 30 yrs, M 26 years
2 daughters 25yo(married with a brand new little daughter) & 20yo
D-Day 18 Aug 2012
6mth EA lead to 4mth PA with CO-W. I found out 8 1/2 yrs later
Posts: 1300 | Registered: Oct 2012
Member # 39217
| Posted: 11:37 AM, June 6th (Thursday), 2013|
Yes I had this super bad right away & it has gotten better but it hurt so bad I didn't know how I could take it....it was a deep intense pain and one night I woke up crying & ended up waking H because I couldn't hardly breathe the pain was so bad. Thankfully it has gotten better
but somedays I still hurt physically
Married 11 yrs
D-Day: 4/9/13 he cheated in '08 & now + trickle truth & tons of lies 6/27 Found more, swears I really do have the whole truth now.
2/2/14 found out more...it seems the TT never ends.
Trying to R
Posts: 71 | Registered: May 2013
Member # 26970
| Posted: 3:48 PM, June 6th (Thursday), 2013|
..absolutely.. an on-going painful pressure.. continues even after 4 years in R..
..have been to cardiologist for complete physio testing and will need follow-up visits in July and Sept.
..the elephant on the chest describes it well. painful and relentless.
..can't call it anything but heart ache caused by this lifelong double betrayal.
..add the aspect of PTSD.. feeling like my insides have been put thru a blender..
..ain't marriage grand????
trust no other human- love only your pets
She isn't and never was who I thought..I can't believe who I married and what she did to us.
Married 44 yrs (together 48)
18 yr LTA with bff/lawyer !! I do believe in ghosts...
Posts: 4700 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Ontario Canada
Member # 22306
| Posted: 8:28 PM, June 6th (Thursday), 2013|
Yes. I guess it is normal. My heart physically hurt for two years.
Me BH 44
Married 21 years
D-Day Apr 29, 2008
EA/PA - 1 year
Posts: 332 | Registered: Jan 2009
Member # 17772
| Posted: 11:07 AM, June 7th (Friday), 2013|
It is grief.
too long a sacrifice can make a stone of the heart..
Posts: 682 | Registered: Jan 2008
Member # 35215
| Posted: 1:28 PM, June 7th (Friday), 2013|
I suffer from a broken heart too. My heart palpitations also increased after DDay, but not as much since I've been on meds for AD and mood swings.
I suffer greatly from PTSD, stemming from childhood sexual abuse to physical abuse, now to infidelity.
I am far from feeling 'normal'
BS/FWS (me):42 Madhatter
WS/BS:45 Serial Cheater
Together 20 years, Married 15
DDay(s) Too many to count
Final Dday 7/11/14 Same OW2
Ducks in a Row!
"Never seek validation from those who are unworthy."
Posts: 3717 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: California
|Topic Posts: 9|