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Took a break...back and struggling

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dameia posted 6/6/2013 09:54 AM

Hi all,

After my father died on Mother's Day I took a break from SI.

There was just too much stress and grief to add anymore.

My WH was actually wonderful during that time. Supportive, helpful, etc.

He has been traveling a lot for work. All week last week and again this week.

I was okay last week, but this week has taken a huge nose dive. I'm right back at the emotions of DDay. Feeling betrayed, sick, stuck, etc. You all know what I'm talking about.

I don't know what's going on. Is it just another dip in the roller-coaster, a delayed reaction to the grief from losing my father, the fact that we are coming up on our first DDay anniversary? The list goes on and on.

So anyways, howdy all, sorry I was gone for a while. I hope you are all finding some peace, and if you find it can you send it my way please?

stillhere09 posted 6/6/2013 09:59 AM

Hello, dameia. Welcome back. Sending you strength and peace.

So sorry to hear about your dad.

And sorry about the nose dive.
It may be just another dip in the roller coaster. Have there been any signs that raise your suspicions?

TrustGone posted 6/6/2013 10:10 AM


I am so sorry about your father. It is so hard to lose a parent. Just take one day at a time right now. I am glad your WH was there for you during this time. I am also coming up on an anniversary and the 1st annivesary since DDay#2. I am also having a hysterectomy the day before my anniversary, so that scares me as he cheated on me again the same time last year when I was out of town, so I can relate to how you are feeling. (((HUGS)))

dameia posted 6/6/2013 10:24 AM


Thank you. There are no big signs, but he is in a city known for it's depravity (for lack of a better word). He is there for a work conference, so he is busy all day long. That combined with the time difference between us (3 hours) means we don't get to talk. I'm just feeling vulnerable at the moment.


Thank you as well. Losing a parent is very difficult. I hope your surgery goes well, and you recover quickly. Also, I hope your WH will be there for you! I will be sending positive thoughts and prayers your way.

DeadMumWalking posted 6/6/2013 10:53 AM


I'm so sorry things aren't going well just now. I hope it's 'just' a roller coaster dip, but that doesn't make it feel any better while it's happening.

My deepest condolences on the loss of your father. It's a lot to get slammed with all at the same time.

Sending strength and positive, healing thoughts your way.


PinkJeepLady posted 6/6/2013 11:40 AM

So sorry about your father. Very glad to hear WH was supportive though.
Personally, when big events happen, somehow I find the thoughts and emotions coming to the surface even though the event isn't related. I too have wondered what that is all about? I am dealing with the new crisis or sadness and then all of sudden it hits me that on top of it, my WH did what????
I would have to chalk it up to the roller coaster,
Take care, I hope you find comfort in your time of grieving with wonderful memories of your father!

dameia posted 6/6/2013 17:32 PM

Thank you DMW and PJL.

It's nice to be back and able to get support from people who know what you're going through. I really appreciate it.

PinkJeepLady posted 6/6/2013 17:46 PM

Thank you for supporting me as well! SI has been my lifeline, I just can't even imagine going through this nightmare alone.
Take care!

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