SurvivingInfidelity.com Forum Archives

Shockleader posted 6/6/2013 18:02 PM

The last written line of my profile:

"Oh, one last thing; if you are a person who has brought upon another person infidelity, cheating, whatever you call it, believes it's OK, or turns a blind eye to the unbelievable pain it causes, full stop... It's a complete deal-breaker for me."

Yep, making clear right up front about that issue. What good it does, I don't know, but at least it shows potential people in crystal clear terms where I stand... Wish they had a question about infidelity, integral to the process.

InTheRabbitHole posted 6/6/2013 18:05 PM

The only problem is that people lie like crazy.

As someone currently doing the OLD thing, I might view that and back out as I'd be concerned about unfinished business. While that is also a deal breaker for me, I look for positive spins on things.

You might want to stress that loyalty and honesty are part of your core values and you look for partners who feel the same.

Take anything I say with a bushel of salt. My profile references my love of the number 42.

little turtle posted 6/6/2013 19:26 PM

I preferred to keep my profile very positive. I steered away from profiles that sounded like they have baggage or are still healing from a negative experience.

I'm doubtful that you will get a positive response from that last line. Players will try to play and loyal people will be loyal. I'd either delete or rephrase your last line to attract healthier people.

h0peless posted 6/6/2013 20:16 PM

My profile references my love of the number 42.

One of my dogs is named Zaphod. The name totally doesn't fit his personality though. :)

Shockleader posted 6/6/2013 22:36 PM

Thanks. profile re crafted, that section, gone... Tonight's been fun. Chatting with several ladies, and my profile has been seemingly active. Hmm, maybe this old dog can run after all.

ButterflyGirl posted 6/6/2013 23:49 PM

Take anything I say with a bushel of salt. My profile references my love of the number 42.

I think the problem with saying you don't want someone who "turns a blind eye to the unbelievable pain it causes" is that the cheaters who do that still don't realize the pain it causes. They feel justified in their actions, so I don't think a truly unremorseful cheating woman is going to read that and think it applies to her, because she wouldn't ever think what she did was wrong.. They don't call it a "blind eye" for nothing.. They are *blind* to the pain they caused..

I don't look forward to online dating, but I have a feeling I'll give it a go one of these days. And I'm sure my first couple profiles will not be as positive as they should be. Even though it won't matter given what I've written above, I'll probably be the one of the ones who have "NO CHEATERS!!" written on there somewhere

I'm glad you are having fun with it and meeting some nice ladies! Good luck on your search

little turtle posted 6/7/2013 11:08 AM

Keep us posted!! I love reading the stories of new romance!