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KBeguile posted 6/8/2013 23:53 PM

I'm very pleased to report that I had a heartfelt and very direct discussion with Heart about our situation. I have gained new insights as to her personal feelings and her position, as well as having a better understanding of myself and my growth since D-Day.

The best part, though, is that I didn't take any of it personally, I didn't start withdrawing, I didn't have a pity party, or any of that other "all about me" crap. It was really a great feeling.

Jrazz posted 6/9/2013 00:47 AM

That's great to hear, KBeguile. In keeping with the vein of selflessness, how did SHE feel about the talk?

Hopefully a followup with her reveals some kind of relief and comfort.

[This message edited by Jrazz at 2:11 AM, June 9th (Sunday)]

KBeguile posted 6/9/2013 01:54 AM

According to her, it was comforting, validating (of my Craniorectal Implantation), and insightful (into how I thought pre-D-Day). I think she's relieved to see that I've made visible progress. Hell, she flat-out told me that "(she) didn't need (me)," and I took it far better than I would have pre-D-Day (which would have been to mope, disagree, whine, and so forth).

Upon further investigation/reflection, we have established that the Fog is now only apparently conditional and contained to certain situations, rather than being wide-spread and interfering in everything I try to do; it's pretty well-contained to my NPD tendencies now. I don't try to do as many "mental gymnastics" with regard to my behavior during my As, nor do I attempt to defend myself or the OPs.

I still need to work on NPD-related issues, but I'm getting there.

Jrazz posted 6/9/2013 02:11 AM

That sounds like a LOT of work. Hopefully you are experiencing some relief from your new path as well.

authenticnow posted 6/9/2013 06:28 AM

Good job, KBeguile! Keep going .

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