You need to be completely transparent..give him fuill access to all of your accounts,and your cell,including passwords.
Write out a timeline..from the beginning to the end of the A. Give all the detail you can remember..and set it in a safe place,for your BH is he wants it.
Answer all of his questions with total honesty.
Tell him everything..EVERYTHING.
Get tested for STD's and give your BH the results.
If you work or associate with the OM in any way,stop.
Write a NC email to the OM..."I am committed to my husband and my marriage,any further contact will result in legal action."
Be accountable for your time away.
Do not defend what you have done. Take full responsibility for your affair..no blaming your BH.
Get into IC and figure out why you did this.
Did you tell anyone about the affair? Did they tell your BH? If not,these friends have to go..they are not friends of your marriage.
Get rid of anything the OM gave tou.
Block any way your OM can contact you.
If he attempts contact,do not respond and tell your WH.
Understand you have put your BH on an emotional rollercoaster for the next year or so. Be patient and remorseful.
If he told his parents..apologize to them for hurting their son.
Being betrayed is traumatizing. It will affect your BH for years to come..R is difficult and painful. Make sure you're committed.
M: June 2001
Status: Reconciled. Love my "new" husband!
..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.