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shot*dead (original poster member #19440) posted at 2:56 AM on Sunday, June 16th, 2013
I haven't been here in a LONG time but I can't tell you how reassured I was to find that I could just log back in and post when I felt myself triggering.
Aside from the A, porn has been a big issue in our marriage. Someone here once stated, "it is not a friend of the marriage" and that is what I thought we had agreed to as a couple.
My husband recently had to replace his phone. When we connected to the computer, it gave me the option to go to a back up point for his phone from last fall and install everything from that point so he wouldn't lose his photos of our child. In among the photos was a very busty girl, amateur photo, half-dressed.
I freaked. He freaked out because I was freaking out. I did a google search on the image and found it all over the internet--lots of people claiming it was their girlfriend or their ex.
It doesn't appear that he took this photo himself. However, it does appear that he at the very least looked at it and saved it to his phone. His answer is that a friend must have texted it to him and when he opened it, it saved to his phone. I don't know if that's how texting works or not because it's not something that I do. I was hoping someone else would know how an image can be saved on your phone. Do texts automatically save the images in your photos or do you have to find them on the internet and intentionally save them?
I'm tired of perfectly reasonable explanations and have difficulty accepting them at this stage.
Me: 40
H: 40
A took place during courtship. Found out FAR into the marriage. Problem compounded by H's internet porn addiction. Still trying to sort things out and regain some semblance of trust.
Darkness Falls ( member #27879) posted at 3:03 AM on Sunday, June 16th, 2013
When people have sent me pictures within text messages and I have opened them to view the image, they are saved to an album in my gallery called "downloads." My smart phone does this automatically; I've never had to manually save them to this folder. Possibly your husband's is the same way.
Married -> I cheated -> We divorced -> We remarried -> Had two kids -> Now we’re miserable again
Staying together for the kids
D-day 2010
BeautifulEmpty ( member #38763) posted at 3:06 AM on Sunday, June 16th, 2013
I have an iPhone. When people text me pictures, I have to intentionally save the photo to my camera roll otherwise I lose it when I delete the text conversation.
I'm not sure if other smart phones are different but pics take up space on the phone and if your phone auto saved every photo, your phone would soon have bajillions of pics on it eating up space so I have a hard time believing a phone would auto save.
You could try sending the phone a text pic and see what it takes to save it? At least try it on his new phone. Then you'll know if anything else ever shows up.
Me: 44 BS
Him: 40 FWS
Ow: 47 head case, no obs
5 DD's: 23, 20, 19, 17, 12
Last D-day: August 2012 with lots of very blurry lines.
shot*dead (original poster member #19440) posted at 3:10 AM on Sunday, June 16th, 2013
Thanks very much for the input. I will find a time when he's out of the house without his phone to text a photo and see what happens with it.
Thanks for listening. :)
Me: 40
H: 40
A took place during courtship. Found out FAR into the marriage. Problem compounded by H's internet porn addiction. Still trying to sort things out and regain some semblance of trust.
Athena1979 ( member #39393) posted at 3:56 AM on Sunday, June 16th, 2013
I work for a cellphone company and worked as a tech support rep and have had numerous trainings on all smartphones.
I could see a picture that was sent to him as an attachment would save under "downloads". But the downloads shouldnt be transferring when connecting to a computer. A picture attachment that needs to be opened by downloading first is usually sent via email. I can't think of an occurrence that a picture message would ever send as an attachment. Unless his phone wouldn't support the picture, but if that were the case, it would just give an error.
So...it might have auto saved, but only because it was sent via email. picture messages MUST be clicked on and intentionally saved. Plus, the attachment of an email MUST be clicked on first to download.
You would also be able to tell where the file came from by checking the file type. How was it saved?
There are too many variables and I am a smartphone guru. What kind of phone did he have and what phone did he move to? Were you using iTunes, since you were connecting the phone to a computer? I imagine, otherwise, you would have used gmail.
Married 11/11/11
2 kids
D-day 12/27/12
D-day 4/12/13
D-day 6/26/13
You know perfectly that you can only change what you accept....never forget that there are two kinds of pain, the one that hurts and the one that makes you change.
CatchyUsername ( member #39415) posted at 11:59 AM on Sunday, June 16th, 2013
When I am using WhatsApp (a free texting app) on my iPhone with my friends overseas and they send me a picture, if I look at the picture it automatically saves it to my camera roll.
shot*dead (original poster member #19440) posted at 1:20 AM on Monday, June 17th, 2013
Athena~ Thanks for the help. He had an Iphone 3 and went to a 4. He has wiped the photo from his phone, but not before it downloaded all of his photos onto my computer. I saved the photo to do some internet snooping about it. Would the information on how it saved be on my computer as well or would that info had to have come from his phone?
Me: 40
H: 40
A took place during courtship. Found out FAR into the marriage. Problem compounded by H's internet porn addiction. Still trying to sort things out and regain some semblance of trust.
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