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Topic: Read this about trust

rachelc
♀ 30314
Member # 30314

Posted: 4:46 PM, June 18th (Tuesday), 2013

"You either trust yourself or you don't trust yourself. When you don't trust yourself, you will not trust other people.
When you do not trust other people, you cannot trust the process of living or loving in which other people are involved. When you don't trust love other people you cannot live openly or fully. When you are not open to living fully, it means that you expect to be hurt. This expectation makes you constantly afraid that you can't handle the pain. When you don't believe you can handle something, it means you don't trust yourself. This is exactly where we started." -

Iyanla Vanzant.

his Dday: 2/10 but TT until 7/11
my Ddays: 1/12, 4/12 broken NC 12/12

me (WW/BS): 48
him: (BS/WH)52
4 kiddos in mid 20's

“Most things will be okay eventually, but not everything will be. Acceptance is a small, quiet room.”

Posts: 6123 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Midwest

loveisareddress
♀ 36474
Member # 36474

Posted: 4:50 PM, June 18th (Tuesday), 2013

Sounds like a load to me...

Scorched earth-Like Peter the Great, he burns up his own territory in order to gain the upper hand while his own people suffer.

I don't need you to be happy. I just need you to leave me alone when I am.

Posts: 445 | Registered: Aug 2012

Rebreather
♀ 30817
Member # 30817

Posted: 4:52 PM, June 18th (Tuesday), 2013

It doesn't address trying to regain trust in someone who stabbed you in the back so...

I do agree we must trust ourselves. I came to the conclusion that I found out once, I'll find out again if he cheats on me, and that I'm strong enough to take it. So, I trust myself 100%.

Me BS
Him WH
2 ddays in '07
Rec'd.
"The cure for the pain, is the pain." -Rumi

Posts: 6794 | Registered: Jan 2011

crestfallen
♀ 27993
Member # 27993

Posted: 5:01 PM, June 18th (Tuesday), 2013

Exactly, Rebreather! You nailed it!

Happens again, trust me...I'm outta here!

BS-me-57
WH-57
Married 32 years
OW-Mr. Ed ish! Seriously!
DDAY- 2/21/09
TT until 1/10/10
Working on R and doing well!!

Posts: 187 | Registered: Mar 2010

JustWow
♀ 19636
Member # 19636

Posted: 5:02 PM, June 18th (Tuesday), 2013

some people I simply do not trust because they are untrustworthy. I trust my gut and common sense and my own two eyes, so therefore I don't trust them. I trust they can work on their shit far away from me and my life will be fuller without them. I trust that sometimes it is wise to not trust some people.
[This message edited by JustWow at 5:03 PM, June 18th (Tuesday)]

BW - Reconciling
edited for typos (I always have to!)
some people I simply do not trust because they are untrustworthy. I trust my gut and common sense and my own two eyes, so therefore I don't trust them. I trust they can work on their shit far away from me and my life will be fuller without them. I trust that sometimes it is wise to not trust [bold][bold][italic]some[/italic] people.[/bold]

Posts: 3673 | Registered: May 2008 | From: Midwest

Kierst13
♀ 39197
Member # 39197

Posted: 6:17 PM, June 18th (Tuesday), 2013

I trust me. I trust me to take care of me and make decisions that are in my best interest. However, there are other people I do not trust with me, and it has nothing to do with me trusting myself.

It has everything to do with them being untrustworthy people. I can always pick myself up and dust myself off no matter what anyone else does to me, no matter how heinous, doesn't mean I will trust the offender again. At some point that would simply make me a fool.

Story in my profile
He lied, I gave the gift of R
He became the model remorseful WS...all while lying and seeing her
Am I done? Yes I am!

Posts: 347 | Registered: May 2013

Topic Posts: 6

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