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roughroadahead posted 6/18/2013 17:13 PM

So I get a call from Waffle today. Apparently his father has been diagnosed with vascular dementia. He's in his mid 60s.

So why did Waffle call me first? OK, fine, I have a PhD in neuropath, so he had questions.

More waffling, and I feel bad because FIL has been in my life for almost 14 years. It turns out he's an alcoholic WH (did not know that at the time of my M!), so that's one side of it. He's also my kids' grandfather, although sadly they wouldn't recognize him if he passed them on the street.

I feel bad for Waffle if he has to watch his father decline. Maybe it will be a reality check for Waffle staring down his own mortality, but I doubt it.

Someone tell me "not your problem. Doesn't matter"

ButterflyGirl posted 6/18/2013 17:43 PM


Didn't you just see him riding around with OW? Isn't she supposed to handle these types of issues now? He fired you from the job of caring about him and helping him deal with his problems..

And you answered a phone call from him?? I refuse to do that.. Email and text only buddy..

But on another note, I'm sorry to hear about your FIL.. I was so close to my in-laws for more than a third of my life, so I will always care about them (even though they've totally believed his lies without even asking me first if they were true).

I would talk to your FIL and send him well wishes if you want, but I wouldn't be helping your WH deal with any of his feelings about it. Not your problem anymore..


roughroadahead posted 6/18/2013 17:46 PM

I did just see him riding around with OW. Fucker.

I believe he wanted info on the neuropath, although it's been 5 years since grad school.

You're right, though. Not my problem. Not my problem. Not my problem.

ETA: FIL hated me for being overeducated, among other things anyway

[This message edited by roughroadahead at 5:46 PM, June 18th (Tuesday)]

Holly-Isis posted 6/18/2013 18:22 PM

This is cold, but that's what they pay insurance talk to the doctor.

And Google...WebMD...

ButterflyGirl posted 6/18/2013 18:23 PM

FIL hated me for being overeducated

Geez, what an asshole. Sounds like he was jealous. Or intimidated as he prefers people he perceives are stupid or easily manipulated..

Fuck both those guys.. Save your pity for people who deserve it..


dmari posted 6/18/2013 18:28 PM

not YOUR problem!! Even if he has been in your life for 14 years, I doesn't sound like you were close. Yes, it is sad but educating WH is not your job.

suckstobeme posted 6/18/2013 18:55 PM

You know what, FTG. Seriously.

This is gonna sound mean, but it's pretty shitty that he's all concerned about his alcoholic father who now has health issues, but, at the same time, sees nothing wrong with diddling around with OW while YOU are raising three autistic children.

He's a selfish prick and IMO has a lot of balls coming to you for help in his time of need, especially when he knew full well that the old man didn't treat you with kindness or respect.

This is not your problem. FTG!

thebighurt posted 6/19/2013 11:36 AM

Definitely NOT your problem. I hope you didn't give him any info or advice. He can google or WebMD it like Holly-Isis said. He no longer deserves to mine your knowledge.

I agree - FTG!! Really!!

tesla posted 6/19/2013 15:44 PM

What the what? Cant the guy talk to the doctor, call around to specialists? Nope, he's gotta go for a soft place to land. Tell me when he has been that soft place to land for you?

roughroadahead posted 6/19/2013 21:12 PM

Waffle's family don't live here (ie in the USA). Neither do mine. Nevertheless, he's an RN. It's not that hard to figure out.

Just to give you guys an example of waffle crazy:

Today is court-ordered Wednesday, so I picked up the kids at his house. Very business like exchange, he gave me the CS check, hardly a word. Before my car is at the end of the former marital street, I get a text asking if I'd had the oil changed. WTF?? So random.

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